I really had positive expectations for 2025! I really, really did!
After all, 2023 was my year - the year of the kidney and tumor surgery and all that trickled down from that medical event. And 2024 was my husband’s year - the year of the Esophageal Cancer diagnosis and the side effects of those treatments. And both of those events have continued to impact the current year in one way or another it seems.
My husband had a follow up with his oncologist this week. The PET scan from December still showed a small area of swelling or uptake of the nuclear infusion at the site of the cancer. The doctor has ordered a second PET scan for the end of March. It is possible that this swelling is still part of the healing process. But it could also mean that the cancer remains. We won’t know until the end of March. His blood work has also not returned to its normal status yet. That may also take time to sort out. If the swelling remains at the next PET scan, the next step is an EGD to view the swelling up close and take biopsies of the area in question - to determine definitively if it is cancer. If it is, the next step is surgery. It is rather a difficult surgery as they cut out the portion of the esophagus with the cancer and “attempt” to reconnect the esophagus to the stomach. Literally that is what the oncologist said. Attempt. Although I knew all of this from my own research - including the surviablity statistics from this kind of cancer, it is hard to accept. While I have a positive outlook most of the time, I couldn’t help feeling pretty depressed by this news. The odds are not in his favor with this cancer. But I keep reminding myself that the odds were against me as well with the kidney and tumor removal in 2023 - 90% chance the tumor was cancer - and it wasn’t! I can’t help the feeling we are just putting one foot in front of the other as we walk through this cancerous condition - hoping for the best on the other side.
My own contribution to the train wreck that 2025 is building up to be is my right knee. I saw the ortho guy last week. He said I was an "ideal candidate" for an arthroscopy because I have “plenty of room” in my knee to make that repair if it is a meniscus tear causing the pain. He ordered an MRI. That test was completed, and beyond the normal degenerative changes found in a 77 year old knee, the MRI found multiple complex tears in the medial meniscus. hmmm ... I was expecting the meniscus tear (single) - but not 'multiple complex tears' (plural.). I will be back in ortho again in a week to see what his recommendations are. My goal is to have any surgical recommendations done asap, so that I am healed enough to support my husband should he need surgery. Having been through a meniscus repair before in 2017 - I have some idea of the recovery time line. But the diagnosis of multiple tears is worrisome. Regardless, I have my mind set to fix this knee whatever it takes. I want to be able to take a 30 minute walk outside without a cane - like normal people, and be able to climb stairs again like normal people.
So, 2025! I am trying not to cross any bridges before we get there. But the "writing on the wall” for both these conditions isn’t hard to read. I suspect when all is said and done, I will be glad to see 2025 gone - just like 2023 and 2024! Or if luck holds - maybe 2025 will clean up the mess that 2023 and 2024 left behind. Not sure we have THAT much luck left to us.
Already - I am welcoming 2026!
(not a good thing when it is only February!!)
I think I will focus only on the next month for now ... We are both in a holding patterning for the time being. I will enjoy my favorite season of the year - winter. Participate in my favorite hobby - knitting - having signed up for my first MKAL (Mystery Knit-a-Long). Binge watch my favorite TV shows - currently Bones - which has a ton of seasons! And enjoy my favorite books - currently Gravewater Lake: A Thriller by A. M. Strong. Keep my ear buds in my ears while my husband watches the news of Trump dismantling our government. Basically do my rendition of an Ostrich with his head in the sand!
This is the year for that I believe.
