Thankful!

Here I sit typing away at my computer at 5:30 am the day after Thanksgiving!  It is peaceful and comforting to have this very quiet time today.  No "Black Friday" hub-bub for me.  Just the gentle beginning of a day filled with ... nothing. I love days filled with nothing!  They are so few and far between.

Our Thanksgiving yesterday was small. The food was traditional and functional if not entirely mouthwatering (remember: not the cook sitting here.) But it was a good Thanksgiving for many reasons.  Our daughter was with us - as she is most weekends and Milo, her dog.  We spent the morning finishing up a Halloween puzzle with a brand new tool that made the puzzling so much better (that post is scheduled for publishing on Sunday.) We watched the Thanksgiving Day parade from New York (fun but different with no on-sight attendees) and followed that up with the Dog Show - always great fun.  There was no audience there either - just cardboard cut outs of people and dogs in the stands.  As odd as it was to see no one at these two events - it was wonderful to see that precautions like this are being taken seriously. And we visited by Google Video and Zoom with family during the day.  Yes, that was a Thanksgiving to be grateful for in many ways.

While many were technically missing from our dinner table - no one was permanently missing as some families experienced this year!  So for that I am forever grateful.  The first holidays after someone has died are always so terribly hard.  Many lost family members this year due to Covid. 

Finally, what I am most grateful for is the fact that I have adapted to this new way of living without too much feeling of loss.  I know that many are still struggling with this, because you see and hear about it on the TV - big group events where no masks can be seen, people "taking a break" from the pandemic protocols - "just this once."  And later hearing the stories of how they contracted Covid with just one lapse in judgement!  It is hard.  Just plain hard for some to change the way they live for this long a time.  But I am grateful beyond measure that for whatever reason - I am content to ride this pandemic out safely - with minimal sacrifice - and hopefully come out on the other end well. Truly a reason to be grateful.

A belated Thanksgiving wish to you.

Stay healthy and happy with the season - just as it looks now!

Be thankful!

 

Thank You Readers

I haven't said this yet.

Image Credit

Thank you for sticking with me during this difficult (and some times whiny) time.
  It began to feel to my own ears like I was obsessed ... going on and on and on ...
as I worked my way through this mega life change.
Even as I was writing I was feeling annoyed with myself - sometimes telling myself
 'GET OVER IT' for gosh sakes!!  

And yet I couldn't - at least then.

It was part of the reason I took a small break - until the townhouse sold.
  I was just tired of feeling the way I was feeling, I couldn't shake it,
and I couldn't inflict any more of that on you.

I am way better than I was - and we are doing well.

But a major thank you to all of you.

You guys are the best!

Thankful

In Blog World it seems like November is the month for giving thanks publicly for all of our blessings ... and everyone's life is filled with blessings if they just look!

This process of giving thanks is a way to honor our American holiday of Thanksgiving.

I visit a number of wonderful blogs - some devote one post to gratitude, some do it all month long, and some do it periodically throughout the year.  What a wonderful way to create a "gratitude journal."  I have heard from many sources that a gratitude journal is a very effective method of making your own life joy filled.

I clearly have not done it at all.

So here goes. My list for November 2013 - and I will go for 20!

The big things I am grateful for:

1. This blog.  I would never have discovered my love of writing without it or discover such wonderful blog friends.  Without this blog I'd have had no place to vent pour out my thoughts. They would pile up in my head and leak out my ears and generally make my life constipated. (hmm ... better stop that line of imagery now.)  
2. For my wonderful body.  It responds soooo well to exercise ... like when my knee gave out.  It is healthier than many of my peer group - without much help from me I might add.  It continues to run problem free (knock on wood) despite the fact I don't always fuel it with healthy things.
3. For my mind.  So far ... so good - at least that is what my mind is telling me about itself today. 
4. For my family.  Really ... my "by-chance blood relatives" are great.  Sure, there have been a few bumps in the road, but a loving family makes the struggles of life easier.
5. My retirement.  I have been known to say that "someday I will really get to retire."  But truthfully, without retirement almost 7 years ago I wouldn't have had the time or energy to be there for my mom.  She was and is my first retirement project.
6. For my mom.  I am so lucky to have her still with me.  At 87 (next February she will be 88), I know my time with her is limited. Her struggles with aging have put perspective on my own older years.  I also discovered a level of compassion I wouldn't have seen in myself without her.
7. For my town home.  This town home has housed so much of my life over 28 years.  Kids, mothers, deaths, weddings, friends, parties, hobbies, sadness and joy.  I discovered just this year how important all that was.  Yes, we were thinking of moving, but when that decision was tabled ... relief!  I guess I wasn't ready to give up these 4 walls and the memories they hold just yet.
8. My room full of yarn and stuff.  Nu'ff said!  :-)
9. My grand dogs and my cats.  Meathead, Grimace and Milo.  Wally and Max.  Just last November my dear Meathead was so sick (at 10 years of age - old for an English Bull Dog) that euthanasia was a thought looming in all our minds.  One year later (now 11 years of age and very old), he is doing just fine.  Dogs are such great companions because they make you feel pretty special.  Cats are such great companions because they tell it like it is - "Think your pretty special?  Think again."
10. My husband.  Who drives me crazy some days, who is losing his vision all days, but who has stood by my side for 44 years worth of days - through some pretty dark times.  

Now for the smaller stuff:

1. My computer, iPhone, iPad, and Kindle - wow, am I on board with the electronic life or what!
2. My Subaru - such a reliable car. 
3. My water bottle - that reminds me all the time to "Drink more water!"
4. Coffee - my first friend of the day
5. Wine - my last friend of the day - the friend that rewards me while I cook dinner and gets me through this process 365 days a year.  Thank God one glass is supposed to be heart healthy.  Thank you God!
6. Veggies - my new best friend. Thank you Mother Nature!
7. My FitBit Flex pedometer - that keeps me off my butt a little bit more.  A Mother's Day gift from my daughter.  Thank you Kris.
8. My causal wardrobe - if I had to wear heels and dress clothes everyday I would puke!
9. My lists - that keep me from day-dreaming my time away.
10. My quiet time - time to look "inside" yourself and see how things are going.

You know, when you do this process - look for the things you are grateful to have - the list can be endless.  And the stuff that seems to be lacking - fades away for a bit.

A good thing to do!  And I do feel more joy-filled!

Thankful for a difficult year

Traditionally people reflect on all to good things in their lives this time of year. As I reflect on this year all I can see are the struggles, disappointments and losses.

And still I am thankful. I have learned a lot about who I am. And I have learned to change my view of life.

• I managed to keep mom in my home for the most difficult year of both our lives.
• I lost a very close family relationship ... one that I thought would be with me until the day I died ... and discovered I could manage without her.
• I grew to realize I could not be "all" for my mom, that I had to let go, and give up her care to others more able to manage the challenge of her declining abilities.
• I said a quiet goodbye to a dear uncle and celebrated the wonderful life he lead and the family he left behind.
• I found unanticipated support and strength in friends who walked this path before me.
• I rediscovered the fact that I have the best kids in the entire world. I know this for a fact. Don't bother to argue with me.

It hasn't been the best year of my life and it may not be the worst - but it will probably count in the top 3 of worst years for sure.

You never really know how strong you are until you are tested. This year was nothing but a litany of tests. I passed a few, I bent under a few, and I probably failed a few. But I am glad to discover that I am still the same person, maybe stronger than I thought - someone who is surrounded by a loving family, who is living by her own judgements, and who despite the worst this life has dealt out to me thus far ... is still standing.

Where are my manners? Thank You.

A startling thing happened to me on Sunday!

So startling to my mind that I forgot my manners.

I failed to comment on it publicly and thank this blogger

for her most gracious nod in my direction.

I was asked by Doris Plaster to guest post on her blog called Hold My Hand. Doris is a social worker in a nursing home, and her blog postings are a reflection of her professional experiences presented in the form of touching short stories. I believe they also raise the awareness in readers to the issues of aging with snippets of perspective and understanding.

I "met" Doris this spring through an April A to Z Blogging Challenge. I was drawn to her blog for obvious reasons - I live with an aging mother. Recently she released a book that patterned her participation in that blog fest called Home Sweet Home: An A to Z collection of 50-word stories on aging and health care (Volume 1). I am waiting for my copy from Amazon as I write.

When I started the series of posts called Through My Care Giver Eyes, I never thought it would lead to guest posting on such an exceptional and well respected blog.

Doris, thank you so much for giving me this opportunity. When I responded to your request (after I picked myself up off the floor), I said I was honored to guest post on your blog.

Honored from the bottom of my heart.

If you haven't yet visited Hold My Hand, please do so ... you won't be sorry.

Retired Knitter

Care Giver and Daughter

Thank you and an idea!

First, let me say a sincere thank you to all who have visited my blog and decided to officially tag along with me now and then. As a new blogger, it is a great thrill for me to open my blog, see a new name or face, know that they read something I wrote, comment, and plan on returning. It puts a smile on my face. Since starting this blogging journey I have consistently felt (and still feel) that I would blog even if I had no readers. But readers are like icing on the cake. I can eat cake and enjoy it, but I love the icing. Thank you!

And I had this idea:

In my cruising through the A to Z April Challenge Blogs I found a lot really great blogs. Some were striking in their design, others told an ongoing story of their life, many were focused on writing and writing skills. But on occasion, I would read an individual post that I thought was special. When that happened, I couldn't help but wonder - how do we call attention to that one posting - how do I direct other readers to something I think they would enjoy.

I know the purpose of this blog event was to accept and complete a personal challenge - to post to your blog for 26 days using an alphabetic prompt. But why not share individual discoveries with others? Would spot-lighting a few posts at the end of the month be a detrimental to the heart of this challenge, or would it add enjoyment because you got a chance to see something you might have missed? I believe the latter.

So my May 1st posting will spotlight a few individual posts (probably 5) from other blogs that I want to share with you. I have a feeling picking just 5 will be pretty hard. You may already be subscribed to the blog of the posting I spotlight - but if not, you might enjoy checking out a few posts that I thought were worth your time.

And if you think this is a good idea, I would LOVE to see a few of your favorites on May 1st - postings I might have missed. With over 1,000 blog participants we can't check in on everyone, but we can be pointed to those who seemed to shine on a certain day.

Tomorrow? Picking up the pace. Eight postings down - 18 more to go!! Think of it as mile 8 in a 26 mile marathon - we have a ways to go.

I am still excited about it!

Breathe, Breathe ...

Pulling out of a fiber funk!

This year it seems I took a bit of a hiatus from knitting. It wasn't planned. I actually had a very long list of knitting goals back in January 2010 - mostly knitting - because that was what I was into last year.

You see, 2009 was "The Year of Me". Everything I planned to make was going to be for me only. My knitting group friends were also invited to knit things for me (of course, that got a laugh but ... you never know! :-) ) In all my prior knitting years, I made stuff for others, but 2009 was going to be about me. And so I knitted like a mad-woman for the whole year. Big projects. Sweaters mostly, but other stuff as well. I even finished a scarf that I started in 2000 - yes, it took 9 years to complete (don't ask). At the end of 2009 I fell apart on the selfishness vow and knitted a hoodie sweater for my daughter. But other than that, it was me, me, me.

This year the "knitting tsunami" came to a crashing halt. I don't know why but I couldn't get enthused to knit much of anything. I finally made a sweater, that I gave to mom because it was just too warm for me. And I made a hoodie for me, but it is sitting downstairs waiting for buttons. In May signed up for a Knit-a-Long on the web site Ravelry. The sweater was one I have looked forward to making, but I am not very far along (pictured above).

There were a few spikes of new interests this year, however. I bought a spinning wheel, but I am waiting for more time with my cousin to help me get my spinning "legs". I have done some spinning on a spindle but that has been sitting idle recently. I am still very interested in spinning, but I haven't got much time or energy right now for such a big new thing.

A smaller new thing was weaving on hand looms: the Weave-It loom and the Hazel Rose Looms. They have been very easy to learn, and very easy to pick up and put down. They seem to fit very well into the ADD that has been my hobby life this year.

I have begun a new project - a sweater for Milo that will match the matching sweaters my daughter and I have. As far as knitting goes, that is what I am knitting on mostly. It is getting cold outside so that is my main focus.

BUT ... for November 2

Despite my distractions this year, I am very, very thankful for these hobbies, for my large stash of yarn and fiber, for the tools I use to support these hobbies, for the friends and family who join me in these wonderful past times, for my knitting group filled with friends who encourage each other weekly. I am so very lucky.

My interest in these hobbies is still strong. The funk that has been 2010 is fading. I am eager to pick up my needles, my looms, my spinning wheel and spindles ... and I am so grateful for them.

A month to give thanks!

November!

Now begins the season of holidays: Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years! Over the years I have tried to simplify this season. But it would be a shame to lose the specialness of each event between now and January 1, 2011.

When I think of November, I think of all the things I am grateful to have in my life. I am new to blogging, but I have seen several blogs doing something along these lines this year - remembering to be thankful for what you have. I guess I am not original! But I am glad that people take the time to do this. We are all so rich in our blessings.

November 1st - I am thankful for these 3 happy tails. They are waiting at the door for me to return from the grocery store. They love me without reservation! I think that is a dog-thing!! :-) Recently Meathead has been much on our minds. As an epileptic for many years, he has been medicated to control the frequency of the seizures. But the condition continues to grow in frequency, so last week he was started on a new medication that makes him disoriented and clumsy. The vet says it may a take a month for the symptoms to subside. It is hard to watch the seizures, and it is hard to watch his reaction to the new meds. He is such a dear boy. But hopefully this will make a difference after he adjusts. I love these 3 little guys very much. I am so thankful my children shares these wonderful companions with me.

And I am thankful for my two cats - Max and Wally. This picture shows them as kittens in 2006. Getting them in the same picture now is hard. They still get along and play well together. And above all, they get along very well with the dogs - well, they get along very well with Meaty and Grimace. Once Milo gets older and shows some self-control, I am sure peace will abound. But these two little guys are very special to me and my husband. After 42 years of having cats as a part of our lives, we absolutely couldn't do without them. I have already made my whole family promise that someone MUST adopt any pets we have once we are gone. And, of course, Max has special needs, just like Meathead. Max has degenerative kidney disease and we inject fluids under his skin every other day - to help keep him healthy for as long as possible. His prognosis is a shortened lifespan, but we are grateful for every day we have that charming cat with us.