Memories of Halloween

Halloween 2020 was bound to be different from any previous Halloween of my memory.  It was my grand daughter's first Halloween - or rather the first one she would be able to participate in. 

Her parents planned a party at home for her - a small family gathering, just me and her grandfather and her Aunt.  We came done up in witch hats and blinking light necklaces and wrapped Halloween cookies for her treat bag.

My two beautiful ladies - Esk and my daughter!

Her mom made the cutest Halloween cake - from scratch, no less.  Cute as could be and very delicious. (Low in calories, too.  Not!)

Her parents had a Halloween blow up figure in the back yard, a scavenger hunt in the house for Halloween goodies and a yummy dinner of barbecue ribs. 

She was dressed as a ballerina! 

Even her dog Rags had a costume - devil wings - that he wore for only about 2 minutes because he was sort of terrorized by them and we couldn't leave them on when we saw his reaction.  Poor boy.  For such a big imposing bully (English Bulldog), he is secretly not imposing at all.

I love this picture of my son and his daughter. 

He is such a good guy and it warms my heart totally to see him gently nurturing such a beautiful child.  

And Halloween just wouldn't be Halloween unless you visited a neighbor and greeted them with a "Trick or Treat."  Their few neighbors live on 6 or more acre plots - just visible from their own property and trick or treating was a rare occurrence. No other children live on that lane.  

Esk came with a small bag of treats for the neighbors!!

But one neighbor - an elderly couple who seem to have struck up a neighborly relationship with the younger new comers on the lane (my son and his wife) invited this little person, my dear Esk,  to make a trick or treat visit to them.  So we all walked down the lane in the late afternoon to visit and get a piece of candy.   So much fun.  More fun than canvasing a townhouse development or apartment project where the neighbors are on top of each other and the candy haul would become too heavy for those little arms to carry.  

The candy dish was on the bottom step.

And how much fun it was to see the neighbors encourage Esk to take more candy (in fact take the whole bowl - of about 20 pieces) while she had mother's words of repeating in her head, "Esk, when you visit you take just one piece."  You can be sure Esk walked away with all the pieces!

And the adults got to visit for a short time while Esk picked candy one piece at a time.  It was so much fun.

Esk was not frightened at all by the images moving on her walls.  She loves the Halloween cartoons and stories so much.  

Some day things might go back to normal, but for now, making new memories (safe and socially distant memories) is what it is all about.

Her Trick or Treat bag!

 

Making Space #1

So yeah!

  I missed the first week of decluttering!  

Thank goodness this is a relaxed kind of challenge!  

Sigh!

I am joining Beckie at http://www.Fieldlilies.blogspot.com) on an informal challenge called Making Space - Declutter 10 items a week - and if life gets in the way - you might miss a week, but the goal is to post 10 items weekly on the day of your choosing.

It wasn't hard getting 10 items together this first week.  These items are things I have kept for absolutely no good reason.  

• Three magazines all from 2018 - that have been sitting on my end table in the living room.  It is 2020 last I checked! Never opened!  I should never buy magazines.  I never read them.  
• A bag of red mechanical pencil refills.  I don't even own a mechanical pencil and I never write in red. I have no memory of when those refills came into our house.  
• Two mayonnaise jars I saved for some really.good.reason!!! (Not!) Do you save jars?  Am I the only crazy person that saves that kind of thing ... and never use it?  
• A fairly nice piece pottery for storing garlic.  Why would I get rid of that?  Well, I always buy my garlic in jars - already chopped and ready to go.  I did use it once or twice but kept forgetting it had garlic in it!! I threw away a lot of dried up garlic using that pottery.  Stopped using it years ago.
• A pink bag clip that held absolutely nothing closed.  
• And a jar candle.  That candle was used as a door stop in the condo and was left by the previous owner.  I couldn't throw it away because it was perfectly fine.  But I seldom burn candles and when I do I prefer soy candle wax because it leaves less soot on my walls.
• A pair of drug store readers - from my husband when he could partly see.  They were #5s - they don't sell #5 in the store.  They had to be special ordered.

Some of this is going in the trash and some of it will be donate to my local church thrift shop!

Seriously, this first week has been a breeze.  I am sure it will get harder because I have done a lot of decluttering in the past.  But it gives me peace when I move stuff out the door.

Already have the stuff for week #2 collected.  I just need the discipline to sit down and do the post!!

 

Making Space For What Matters

 

I used to participate in 'blog challenges' when the idea of blogging was new-ish and I was looking for content to write about.  Over time I drifted away from that kind of activity - enjoying just reading some of the posts that others provided.

Over the month of October a few blogs I follow were participating in a decluttering challenge.  It was called 30 Days to Less or Minimalism is a Journey.  The premise each day's decluttered items matched the number of the date in October ... and you picture them on your blog before removing them from your home. For example: October 1 - one item, October 2 - two items, and so on.  At first I thought the idea was worthy but too small to make much of an impact ... until we got to the higher numbers of the month, like the 20th, the 21st, ..... the 30th and the 31st!!!  Then the impact got to be substantial and challenging because it was a daily activity with increasing numbers of items with each passing day.  In fact on the final day some bloggers totaled up the discard items to discover that during October they had decluttered close to 500 items.  I consider that very substantial.  I found this challenge about day 10 - and although I was tempted to join in, I didn't see the point of starting in the middle. (an OCD part of my personality that slips into perfection. *sigh*)

So here we are on November 2nd - and one of the participants (Beckie at http://www.Fieldlilies.blogspot.com) decided to continue the challenge and less deadline driven stress.  It is called Making Space - Declutter 10 items a week - and if life gets in the way - you might miss a week, but the goal is to post 10 items weekly on the day of your choosing. That would play out to only 40 items a 4-week month as opposed to almost 500 items in a month!  Doable and also significant.  I will say the title of this challenge, Making Space, has always been the entire reason I have decluttered.  It is the positive stimulus at the end that motivates me to clean things out.  The older I get the more I feel the need for an uncluttered environment. I know that clutter for some is a mental stressor.  For me it is a de-motivator to everything else in my life.  

So I joined!

I am also hoping this practice - besides making space in my condo - will make me a more frequent blogger.  I certainly have fallen off the wagon over the last few months.  I blame it on the pandemic - but in truth - it is just plain laziness on my part.  It takes a certain amount of discipline to post regularly and that is what I have been lacking.  

Thank you Beckie for the gentle nudge resulting in a worthy effort! 

My declutter posts will be published mid-week - Tuesday or Wednesday or Thursday - like Beckie's.  My mind is buzzing already with items on the way out.  Lets see how far this goes!

National Cat Day!!

 Happy National Cat Day, 

Miss Aja!!

Slipping

So much is slipping past me these days.

Imagine my shock when I discovered that time had slipped so far from my last post of August 31st.    We have also slipped into Fall in my little portion of the earth.  The colors aren't in full bloom yet, which seems odd as we are facing Halloween.  The weather has been so odd.  Guess Mother Nature is confused.  But the days are getting shorter - so there is no missing what is happening.  I like Fall, but my very favorite season is Winter.  

And I have totally slipped off my 'knitting mojo' this summer.  I blame it on the pandemic.  

The picture above shows my garter stitch blanket I started in March 2020 done in double worsted weight acrylic.  We finished I just couldn't keep it.  It was too heavy, too big, and filled with too many thoughts related to being Covid 19 home bound.  Just not happy thoughts.  It is now on it way to a thrift shop. 

As much as I like to think this world event hasn't impacted me all that much ... it has.  Something inside me has slipped and my focus on my usual passions like knitting has shifted to more pensive pursuits ... no deadlines to meet, no forced expectations.   

The picture above is a sport weight silk scarf for my daughter.  Very soft and squishy - and almost done.   

It is like I have given myself permission to back away from artificial structures like a to-do list and just go with the flow of doing what seems right at the moment.  Eventually I get around to doing things that actually needs doing (like laundry or vacuuming) - but the world doesn't end because I let something slip to several days later.  Is it the pandemic or just my age that makes me rebel against expectations.  Probably both.  

Taking time to just "be" has worked pretty well in noticing Aja's continued transition.  She is spreading her 'imaginary wings' and claiming her rightful place in our home - more and more every day.  

The picture below is proof positive Aja visits the living room - looking out the living room window at the night. 

When Milo comes for a visit, she makes a point several times of day of coming out of the bedroom - sort of a 'statement' that she is the rightful owner and Milo is the guest.  That is true, of course.  She runs  back to the bedroom if he starts to walk to her - but she continues to make the effort.  Maybe someday they will be friends.  

Here she sits on my lap - brief visits but frequent.  At some point she will relax, I am sure.

She gets on my lap almost every day - sometimes twice in the period of an hour.  She still struggles with feeling comfortable there, but just like everything else she will grow into it.  She has found her perfect hiding place in a plush little bed I put in the bottom of my husband's closet.  She still enjoys her sunny out-in-the-open bed by the window.  And just this week, I found her sitting by an open window enjoying the fresh air - I think she has finally adjusted to the outside neighborhood noise.  The biggest leap has been her adjustment to my husband.  She will always be a "woman's" cat, but she allows him to pet her as long as he doesn't extend that petting session for too long.  He is the 'cat feeder' and she loves her food - so as time goes on she will include him into her circle of trusted people.

She is kind of camera shy so getting good pictures of her is a challenge. 

My other priority during this time of Covid has been my grand daughter.  I see her less often now that she has returned to day-care, so when we finally get together I can readily notice how quickly she is advancing in her language skills, her imaginary play and her concept development.  And for some darn reason she looks forward to coming to my house - 'grandma's house!'  

Last time she visited she was scheduled to come to my house for a sleepover after her nap!  When she awoke she told her mother she would pee and have her apple juice at my house rather than doing it before she left.  hahaha! Love that kid.  It couldn't be that I have something new and different when she comes every time.  Last weekend, she got to be a "princess" in this dress I bought her - complete with a crown, long gloves, necklace and wand!  Best $25 I ever spent!!  

I love this picture of her in her princess regalia - holding an iPad! Sort of a mixture of two worlds!

I keep telling her to aim for Queen - don't mess with this princess stuff.  Be the one in charge!  She is only 2 so we have many molding years ahead of her! Time slips pretty darn fast, however, every time I see her and discover how quickly she grows and develops.  It is a joy to witness but also a sadness.  I want to hold her back just a little to enjoy the beauty and wonder of every stage.  Some day her grandma might be too old her for, not able to keep up with her, or her friends are more important that this old lady ... it is the way of things as they grow ... so these times now are precious in my heart.

Everything is not "sweetness and light."  I hate this new blogger platform.  Why can't they just leave it alone!! But I hate the thought of starting over on another blog system more than sticking with this one.  So I will soldier on ... complaining all the way.

And then I discovered today that about 50 emails in my gmail account were incorrectly directed to Spam.  That is where blog posts from others are directed - to my gmail account.  I thought my blog friends were particularly quiet recently, but I didn't wonder if it was an error.  I read many but too many to try and comment.  Can't help wondering if my computer has a bug of some sort. 

So that is my story here on the East Coast of the USA.  We are 2 weeks from our Presidential Election.  The heat of that has become as hot as the sun!  We need a change back to civility ... we need to return to Country First - not Party First!  I think we need new leadership to make that happen.  I am so tired of all the hate talk, the acts of violence and the insults.  We need to be civil - and we need a leader who at least knows the definition of that word.  I am tired of seeing out Democracy slipping away!  Hoping for a change at the top!

No ... I didn't get a picture ... but I SWEAR it happened!!

That Aja.  

Just when I think she has stopped evolving, she surprises me.

I know I have been absent from my blog for over a month.  It has been a busy summer and there was just no time.  But things are slowing down now and just today, a miracle happened.

I mean we have seen a number of smaller miracles in her short time with us.

Over all, she does a lot that tells me she is happy to be with us.  She likes to rub against us, she enjoys a short scratch or rub around her cheeks and neck, and she joins us for short visits into the living room, kitchen or dining room.  Home base is still our bedroom, of course.  But she always runs out of the bedroom to welcome us when we come home.  She is very interested in her meals, escorting us in a "short parade" from the kitchen to the cat food trays in the bedroom and enjoys looking out the bedroom windows at the birds and people.  Small miracles all ... considering how stressed out she was when she arrived 3 months ago.

But she still has her limits.  Does she let me pick her up?  Oh, no.  Does she come into the living room and sleep on the furniture or visit with guests?  Nope. Does she want to cuddle with us?  Most definitely not!  And just last week I attempted to place her on my lap!  I told my husband that she probably will never be a lap cat! No matter.  She gives what she can and we are happy to oblige her.

And then today she came out into the living room - arrived at my chair

 and jumped onto my lap!  

It wasn't entirely a relaxed action.  She was resting on her feet for about 20 seconds. I tried to act like she did this every day.  Ha! And then she settled down on her side and let me rub her cheeks.  And she was purring.  At some point I pulled my hand away to rest on the arm of the chair - and she hissed and smacked my hand with her paw.  I have learned that this hiss reaction means one of 2 things:  Don't stop!  or Stop! So I started scratching her cheek again.  And then after another minute, I could tell she was ready for me to stop.  I pulled my hand away again.  And after about another 30 seconds she jumped down with a parting hiss.  That hiss in most cats is a warning sign of significance.  But not in Aja.  It is just like another way of talking along with her chirps and purrs and meows!  It all fits into the context of what is going on - whether is is negative or positive.

She is a complicated lady!  

Some of this ... some of that!

For some reason getting a post published lately to this blog has been difficult.  My days have gotten busier I guess.

FAMILY 

Recently family time has increased.  Not seeing my adult kids and my grand baby really began to weigh heavy on me.

My son and his wife work from home now and having a 2 year old around make for difficult productivity.  So I have been spending 3 days from 9 until 2-ish, at their house playing with Esk.

Here she is 'cooking."  I love seeing her use her imagination.  She really does imitate what she sees.

And, of course, there is swing time in the yard.  They recently moved to a larger house and with that move came more space inside and out.  There is a lovely swing set in the yard.  Esk loves to swing.  She is big on saying "faster, faster, faster" until she is going as high as the swing allows.  And if she doesn't think she is high enough, she gets grumpy!  

She also loves to play hide-and-seek - her own version of the game, of course.  Her favorite spot to hide (her only spot to hide) is under the covers in the center of her parents' bed, then she tells me to go to her bedroom - which is down the hall.  Then I am instructed to come back and 'find' her.  She doesn't grasp the fact that I helped hide her.  😂😂😂😂 It is hysterical.

So as I walk down the hall from her bedroom to 'find' her, our game goes something like this:

Me:   Where is Esk?  I can't seem to find her.

Esk:  (no sound)

Me:   Is Esk in this bathroom?  I don't see her.

Esk:  (no sound)

Me:   Is Esk in this closet?  Nope, not there!! (as I get closer to her parents' bedroom.)

Esk:  (little giggle)

Me:   Is Esk in her parents' bedroom?  hmmm ... I don't know.

Esk:  (more giggle and a little shake of the blanket)

Me:   Maybe I should check under the bed!  Or maybe daddy's closet!  Or maybe mommy's bathroom!

Esk:  (small squeal and squished down to make her bump smaller)

Me:   Or maybe, just maybe ... she is under this COVER!!!  (Lifting the cover to reveal her.)

Esk:   (Big squeal and laughter.). Esk want more hide!!!  Help me grandma!  

And when I suggest that it is my turn to hide, she is most distraught - so the game is really Esk Hide and Grandma Go Seek! 

I'll play the game anyway she wants!!

  

We are keeping the social distancing bubble in place by associating only with those who have minimal contact with others. So far that has worked well for my son, daughter and daughter-in-law. 

AJA

Aja's personality is becoming more known over time.  She is friendly.  She purrs.  She loves her food! She talks all the time.  And when she is not happy, we are getting better at reading her body language. (A very important skill.  Ha!)

She loves her bed by the window!!
I think she has even put on a little weight.

She lets you pet her (within reason ... within "her reason" ... so knowing when to stop is important.)  She is exploring the condo more and more.  But holding her in your arms or on your lap is not high on her list ... yet.  She is learning to live with 2 humans in her "family," but not big on company of others - human or dogs (although she seems to like my daughter.)  

Yep!  She is on my bed - even without an invite!  

We have taken to calling her "our little diva."  Just like a "diva"we try to judge her 'boundaries' - giving her just enough but not too much of anything.  

That expression says "Yep!  I own this bed, too!! 😍

It has been hugely helpful to be in semi-regular contact with her first "mom."  I discovered just last week that Aja's birthday was in July 2016 - meaning she is just now turning 4.  Occasionally touching base with this lady has made Aja less of a mystery to us.  We are very lucky to have made contact!  Aja's previous mom has been our "user's manual" for this feline!!

DE-STRESSING

Low level stress with the pandemic, the combative political climate (an election year) and the heart- breaking images of the race issues has a been a constant. 

In some ways the rise of personal cells phones has made it clear just how ugly the underbelly of our country is right now.  And that is a good thing!  You can't change a problem if you don't think there is a problem.  Changing our leadership in November is the first step.  No ... let me correct that.  The first step is peaceful protest!  Which is our right!! And a LOT of it.  The second step is getting leaders in place that will correct all the wrongs of the last 4 years.  There is a lot of work to do.

But how to de-stress from all the terrible events of 2020!!  

I always seem to fall back on "making space in my environment."  Declutter!  Nothing else does that trick for me.  Not even knitting.  Spending so much time at home now - thinning the belongings has become a regular routine rather than a single seasonal binge event.  It started with downsizing my yarn stash which began to feel like a burden.  If you had told me 10 years ago that too much yarn would be burden, I would have thought you insane.  But as time has passed that thought weighs on me ... I couldn't possibly live long enough to knit it all.  And that mind set spreads into other areas of the condo.  Each day I put one bag together of stuff and carry it out of the condo to ... somewhere!  Ironically finding ways to donate stuff during this pandemic has been challenging now that Good Will is closed.  Thankfully I found a Church Thrift Shop not too far from my condo - and they are happy to receive new "inventory." And as I have discovered many times before, I seldom think about the things I get rid of ... once they are gone... so how important were they anyway??

PANDEMIC

This virus is going to be with us a long time.  Building habits now on what can be sustained is how I  think about this summer.

What I can sustain is:

1. Hands washing, hand sanitizer, social distancing and masks
2. Small groups only of folks who follow #1
3. Eating carry out - no eat in restaurants
4. Being content with home based pursuits  

Since I don't work outside the house - those 4 points are do-able.  What I can't maintain is keeping a 'sterile field' in my home like I did in March.  Sanitizing all the groceries that came into the house, wiping down frequently touched surfaces in my house every single night, using disposable gloves all the time - too much, too much too much!  

Certainly everything carries some risk - but building habits that you can consistently do for a year and half or more - is the goal for me.   Getting burned out by living in a sterile bubble and breaking that bubble for "one fun filled weekend" - like some have done - well, it just doesn't make sense.  As one reporter stated, it takes just one exposure at a bar - during one fun night - to undo all the things you did for months previously. 

Nope!  Not me.  Especially when people are still dying such miserable and lonely deaths at such high rates.

So that is my This and That for now!