The Toilet Tale!

I have 4 of these in my house.  

Yes, 4 toilets.  

Three full baths and one half bath.  

I believe I have an embarrassing abundance of toilets. 

In my next abode, one toilet, one bathroom will be enough - well ... let me amend that statement.  After living for 3 days with just one toilet, one full bathroom and a powder room will be enough.  But I digress!

This little toilet above is sitting in my eat-in kitchen.  Didn't you always want an eat-in, poop-in kitchen??

This little toilet should be in my half bathroom on the first floor - but because we are replacing the bathroom floor, the toilet had to be removed from the plumbing and put somewhere else while the work was being done.  It now sits where all my guests can see it!

This second little toilet is sitting in my bathroom tub.  I guess that is an improvement over the kitchen because I could always do my business on it and at least it wouldn't leak out onto the floor!

The third little toilet in the second full bathroom looks just like this one.  I won't bore you with that picture.

So for anyone who is counting, we have exactly one functioning toilet and it is located in the basement (my third full bathroom is there.)

I guess this is an improvement over going outside to an outhouse to do the deed, but our bedroom is located on the top floor and our one functioning toilet is located 2 floors down.   My husband and I are both 66 and cannot be too far from the bathroom for those random visits in the middle of the night.  You old fogies out there get my drift, I am sure.

So my dear husband and I are sleeping on our pull out couch that is only one floor removed from the one functioning toilet!  Our bladders are happier about this, but our backs are less than thrilled.

All of this inconvenience is because my 28 year old tile floor was broken and ugly and it needed to go!!!  So without thinking about the ramifications of doing 3 bathrooms all at once, we scheduled the work.  The picture above shows the tile - minus the grout.  Tomorrow, they say they will finish the job.

I can't even just close the bathroom doors and pretend everything is normal ... because the bathroom doors have been removed and are propped up in my dust filled third floor.  (Did I tell you just how dusty ceramic tile instillation can be? I don't think my allergies will let me sleep up there until I do a complete cleaning.)  My back may be happier in my own bed, but my sinuses will create a major conflict of enormous proportions if I try to sleep upstairs right now.

My bladder, my back, my sinuses ... all so that I can have new bathroom floors.

I suffer so!

:-)

Write 30 Interesting Facts About Yourself

I made another visit to Paula's Place and she is in Day 6 of a blog fest - each day she covers a different topic and each one is entirely different.  Today's assignment was to write 30 interesting facts about yourself.

I am game!  Here goes ...

1. When I was younger I wanted to be an actress.  
2. I had the female lead in my high school play.
3. I didn't know what I wanted to do after college - so I chose teaching. 
4. I was a fair teacher of children by my standards. Great teachers are not made from people who wanted to be actresses.
5. If I had the chance in another life to choose a profession, I would teach college level students or be an actress (or a Cow Boy or an Indian Chief.)
6. I always wanted to be a mother.  Thank God I got to do that.
7. I have a talent for leadership - I always wound up being in charge.
8. I hate being in charge.
9. I have an undeveloped talent for Art - I hope God isn't too unhappy that I ignored that gift.
10. My favorite TV show is Dancing With the Stars.
11. I like a clean and orderly house.
12. I hate to clean.
13. I never had the chance to live on my own. Left my parents' house to get married.
14. I have no tolerance for ditherers.  Make a decision, move forward.  If it is wrong,  make another decision.  It is not rocket-science!
15. I am bad at forgiveness and I never forget.  Some hurts cut too deep.
16. Crap, this is becoming less fun and more like work!!  Just like most everything I have done in my life!
17. I am an evening snacker.  I sleep better with a small snack right before bed.
18. I have a weakness for animals, children and the elderly. 
19. I have been married once.  Once will be enough.
20. I love being alone. I don't get to do that very often.
21. I love the beach.
22. I love the mountains.
23. I love hiking - don't get to do that any more - as my hiking buddy (husband) can't see very well.
24. I love a great big thundery, windy, rain storm.
25. I am wild about snow storms - 2 feet or more is heaven. 
26. My favorite season is winter.
27. I had cataracts in both eyes repaired in my early 50s - early onset cataracts inherited from my father.  To this day I still marvel at the clarity of my repaired vision.  I remember how poor it was before.  I truly appreciate the gift of sight.
28. I hate my neck and chin area.  If I was ever inclined to have something fixed, that would be it.
29. There is nothing I hate more than throwing up! Oh, I abhor snakes.  I guess snakes are worse than throwing up.
30. I love silence!

Done!  Don't know how many of these were "interesting" but at least I got to 30 (I had doubts!).

In 10 years ...

I recently discovered a blog called Paula's Place.  I enjoy following her posts as her current life  somewhat mirrors some of my past and current experiences.  She is a caregiver for her husband who is now in hospice.  I encourage you to visit Paula's blog and say Retire Knitter sent you!! :-)

She offers readers a chance to share thoughts about how you see yourself 10 years into the future.  Other participants can be found at the above blog link.

Myself ... in 10 years

Gosh!  At first I didn't want to do this.

I thought,

"Ten years in the future??  I don't know if that is a good idea.

  Ten years into the past I would never have imagined I was doing what I am today.

  My life looks nothing like I planned.  The future is so uncertain.

  Why set myself up for disappointment, wishing for things to be

 how your rose-colored glasses imagine when life has other plans for you?"

Then my old "goal-centered-self" shook a finger at my "curmudgeon-self" and thought,

"You silly person, sure life is uncertain,

 but you set up this blog thinking about how you wanted to live the next 20 years of your life.

 Maybe you should re-focus, maybe you should look at those goals again,

 maybe, just maybe, 

you can pick goals that you are certain you can attain - that are in your control."

So here I go ...

10 years from now ....

Stuff I have some control over.

• I will be 76! *gulp* (But on the bright side - I plan to be alive!)
• I will look in the mirror and see only the marks on my face of a wonderful life.  (If I can't do that, I won't look in the mirror.)
• I will be happy. (No one controls this but me.)
• I will be healthy. (I am the main contributor to this.)
• I will be active. (I will be active, I will be active, I will be active, I will be active ...)
• I will be financially independent. (Fingers crossed)
• I will look at my blessings, not my limitations. (hmmm .... tattooed on my forehead.)
• I will still be knitting, weaving, reading, and enjoying friends and family. (Otherwise I won't be breathing - and I will be at Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival yearly until I am not breathing! Maybe even when I am not breathing I can get someone to take my ashes there!) 
• I will be living in a much smaller place with less stuff.  (Amen!!!)
• I will live in the moment - not yesterday, not tomorrow, but today! (Another tattoo)

Stuff I don't have control over.

• I will celebrate my 54th Wedding Anniversary!  (I won't be alive by myself!!)
• My husband will still have enough vision left to enjoy life.  (Prayers for that please.)
• I will have my family members close by.
• I will have healed from losses of loved ones that I know are in my future. (deep breath)

And the BIGGEST goal of all will be at 76 to look another 10 years into the future at 86 and and say, 

"Ha!  Age is just a number

  and I will celebrate each anniversary of my birth

 like I did at age 6

 with enthusiasm and zest

 ... and a big piece of buttery vanilla cake

with a big fat sugary red rose right on top!!!"

Through My Caregiver Eyes - the Law of Loss

It has been some time since I did a post on my mom under the continuing series of 
Through My Caregiver Eyes.  

New readers can find other posts in this series under the Through My Caregiver Eyes label

 (Section to the right of my blog posts.)  

The short summary:

  Concern for my mom started when she was around age 78.

  She was independent but red flags began to flicker in my awareness.

The path from independence to living in my home, and finally Assisted Living is documented in this series.  

While our journey through mom's aging is peppered with joy-filled moments,
 it is mostly continuing losses for her and increasing sadness for me. 

For those of you who are caregivers of elderly loved ones, 

you will see yourself in this story.

We are all sisters and brothers under the skin. 

There should be a law...

I propose that as we age our age-related losses be limited to a fixed number ... let say 5 or 10 ... and no more.  More losses than that from a life spent building and growing is a cruel and unusual punishment for the aging person and the caregiver.

My case in point:

The sky is blue, the wind is calm:

Forgetting names

Thoughts that frequently escape in mid-sentence

Ornery left arthritic knee is more ornery

The horizon gets cloudy:

The checkbook won't balance

Decision making becomes a major hurdle

Learning how to do new things like email is never achieved.

Clouds obscure the sun, the wind is picking up:

Social circle shrinks because friends either move away or die

Outside activities become limited

Family begins to worry about your driving

Living independently becomes a question in the minds of loved ones

You begin to prune down your belongings for a future move.

The prediction is for stormy weather:

You move in with family -  independence is lost forever.

You require oversight for paying your bills.

You take a fall but no major damage is done.

Reaching out to distance friends and family is less frequent.

Your car is finally not your car any more - that freedom is lost forever.

Health problems cause hospitalizations and rehabilitations - trouble free health is lost forever.

You become a familiar face at the local hospital.

Emergency Medical Technicians become more frequent guests.

You walk with a cane.  Walking without assistance is lost forever.

Thunder and lightening begins to fill the sky:

You fall again.  This time you injure yourself.
You move into Assisted Living - seeing family becomes less frequent.

Your daughters take over complete control of your medical and financial affairs.

Making new friends is harder and harder.

Hobbies and past times like TV and reading no longer hold your interest.

You walk with a walker. You are labeled a "fall risk."

The storm is here and intensity is growing:

The recliner now is your best friend - even more than your TV.

Sleeping is your main activity - even staying awake for company is very hard.

Medical issues become the major focus of your family.

Walking even short distances is tough.

The wheel chair is the safest way to travel.

This much loss should be illegal.  

Last Sunday as mom and I were leaving Mass, she said she wasn't sure she could make it to the car.  The walk was painfully slow, with many stops to rest.  I suggested next time we take the wheel chair - she weakly nodded.  We made it to the car.  She then told me she didn't think she could go to church on Sunday any more.  

I am not a church-going Christian, but for 15 years I have taken her to church every Sunday because going to Mass was so important to her.  Her words made me want to cry.  As I write these words my eyes fill with tears.

Another loss. 

      Retired Knitter

      Daughter and Caregiver

Today is special

Today is a special day for me.

Linda - left
Elaine (me) - right

This is the day that my dear cousin Linda was born.

For all you folks out there who have large extended families, who get together regularly at holidays or  family reunions, who live near to each other and share the fun things of life together,  ... for all you folks out there ... you need to know that not everyone is a lucky as you.

As children Linda and I enjoyed playing together.  We were friends.  Our parents were related (our fathers were brothers) and had been close.  Her father was my God Father.  Growing up I was several hundred miles away from my cousins.  Somewhere along the years, family issues separated us.  We continued to grow and change, but separately.  As adults, that cousin relationship seemed lost forever.

Then one miraculous day, the distance and years seemed to disappear.  The story and pictures of our reunion thanks to my sister can be found here at this link.  Joy, love and companionship has grown from that reunion and it still remains a miracle in my mind.  We lost probably 40 years of sharing in each other lives, but we are once again loving family and friends.  We are living the life now we were meant to live so many years ago.

 It was meant to be!

 Things that are meant to be cannot be deterred.

Happy Birthday, my dear cousin. 

You are much loved! 

May we continue to build many wonderful memories together going forward.  

Chats on the porch

Although you cannot tell from where you are sitting, our chat today is not on the porch but under a big shade tree.  It is the day after Memorial Day and comfortable - not too hot, not cold.  The days will only get less comfortable as the heat builds, the humidity drips, the earth dries out, your car gets so hot you get burned getting in, you can't take off enough clothes to cool down, the bugs become annoying, the sun never seems to goes away ... (can you tell I am a "winter" person?)  LOL  

Oh where is my beautiful winter!

No matter.  It is another day visiting with friends at Everyday Ruralty.  And there are questions to be answered ...

QUESTIONS

1. When you were a child, what age did you think was "OLD"?
2. How often do you have dessert?
3. What's your favorite kind of exercise?
4. Do you watch movies on TV, movies from a rental or the library, or movies online?
5. Tell me something you remember about your grand mother's/grand father's house? I'm thinking of something you saw all of the time, like a picture, clock, statue, teapot. or some thing that was always there.

1.  How old was "old" when I was a child?  I think considered 40 to be old.   And if my son happens to be reading this post ... it still is old, my dear boy.  Oh, and I hope you have a Happy Birthday this September.  You will be how old?  Now let me think.  I was there so I should know.  Oh, yes, I remember now ... 40!!!

:-)  

That felt good. 

 Glad that was one of the questions!!

2.  How often do I have dessert?  Every darn chance I can.  I don't want to get to the end of my life thinking - oh, why did I pass up that Boston Cream Pie for boiled carrots!

3.  What is your favorite kind of exercise?  Walking.  I should be doing it more.  And second to that is knitting.  My fingers get such a work out.

4.  Do you watch movies on TV, movies from a rental or the library, or movies online?  We mostly watch movies from a rental.  No commercials, on when I want it to be on, and no trips out of the house to get them - delivered by the post office.  Sometimes we watch movies online, but it seems like the ones we want to see are most readily on disk only.

5.  Tell me something about your grandparents' house?  Gosh, I had to think about that one a bit because I only saw them at their house - maybe once a year.  I think the thing I most remember (and sometimes dream about) was my grandparents' porch.  It was a screen in porch - not all that remarkable, but when our family would come to visit (we lived in another state), my dad would sleep out on the porch.  I think they had a big rocker.

Well that is it for this Tuesday chat.  I don't always participate, because I am trying to become more of a free soul - not tied down to stuff like I always seem to do.  There are things in my life that tie me down in a big way, so on the little stuff - I like to keep my options open.  But these questions were fun this time, especially #1!!! 

I am naive!

I just made an unsettling discovery.

Last year I joyfully deleted my Facebook account.  I was frustrated with Facebook but mostly I needed to just get away from a few "time wasters" - Facebook in my life was a time waster.

For those who are curious - there are two levels of Facebook separation.  I can't remember their exact names but here is what I remember from last year:

• First level: you have put yourself in a "temporary time out."  You aren't really serious about leaving.  You want a breather.  You might want to come back again, just not sure.  You want to hold onto your account and all the contacts and information ... but you might want to say "Good Riddens" .. just not sure!  I did that once and came back.
• Second level: you are permanently deleting this account.  You are done, done done with Facebook forever.  Your screen name, friends, pictures ... all the details of your account will be gone . permanently . not to be recalled . not ever not never again.   This is a final action that cannot be recalled.  You cannot change your mind!!  Be sure you want to do that before you hit the "submit" button.  I hit that button last year.  I was done, done, done with Facebook.

Facebook lied.  

Apparently Facebook isn't done with me.

My account was never gone AND just the past month I started getting Facebook updates from friends in my email.  I didn't pay much attention at first.  I saw the word "Facebook" in my in box and I just deleted it.  I was done done done with Facebook!  I was deleted . permanently . finally, forever and ever.  Facebook told me so.

Then I discovered that not only is everything still out there, but my account was ACTIVATED and not by me!!

Everything is still out there and shows just like it did before.  

Very very odd.  

So I promptly went out and changed my password - 'cause maybe I was hacked!  BUT there shouldn't have been anything out there to hack!  My account was deleted . permanently . finally . forever and ever! Done!!

Ok, 

it is now terribly evident to everyone reading this post

 that I am very naive

 and nothing on the Internet is ever totally gone.

I'll try again later to delete this account.  Right now I am afraid to go out to my account - because I will get sucked back in to that "black hole" that I call Facebook.  *sigh*