Apologies to my children

Have you ever felt like a deficiency in your personality

 is beyond your ability to fix?

Do you struggle with a "just nuts" personal behavior and you fear it will be part of your life until you draw your last breath?  To make matters worse, could this unwanted 'whatever' behavior be a burden to your family after you die.  And because you can't seem to change that 'whatever,' all you are left with is an apology?!?

Think on it!  I'll give you a moment.  What would you apologize for after you are dead?

It can't be the typical stuff like losing weight, exercising more or leading a healthier life, because that lack of self control only impacts you - and not those left behind after death!  Deficiencies in kindness, consideration, generosity, gratitude or love don't count either ... because, again, after your death, it doesn't impact anyone else.  In fact, if your are a selfish, insensitive clod in life, others might be glad when you are gone.  Ha!

But give it some thought.

Still no ideas?

Here is a hint!

You come into this life with absolutely nothing

 and you leave it exactly the same way.

I have told this story before but its worth repeating.  My Uncle died suddenly in his 90s. He died within a month of my mom's death. My cousin (his son) called me to offer condolences and to share a family story or two.  One story that made a BIG impression was the positive 'gift' he left for his children after death.  In settling his estate, his children entered his house to prepare it for sale. They discovered a house almost totally devoid of everything, except the actual items he needed for living.   Closets and cabinets were bare, counter and furniture tops were clear ...  the basics of living were all that was left.  Simplicity in its purest form.

Now why do I go through this elaborate exercise to only end up with an apology?

I don't believe my children follow my blog.  They may never receive this apology in the present.  But after I die and they are summing up all the little details of my life, (which I intend to leave as neat and tidy as my Uncle's house,)  they may come across this blog.  They may read the title - Apologies to My Children.  They might read and understand that I wasn't totally insensitive in the burden I left behind for them.

You see, despite all my other good intentions, there will be this mountain of yarn that will greet my children when they come into my condo.  Beautiful colors and wonderful fibers and luscious to the touch ...  all just waiting for someone who knits to pick them up and ease them into a perfect project.  *sigh*.  It pains me to know that much of my yarn will 'out live' me ... still waiting in their turn in balls and cakes and skeins ... patiently waiting and waiting.

I have long since accepted that I can't fix this yarn hoarding problem.  Yes, I downsized yarn, books and knitting tools when we moved. Prior to that I did a massive inventory of exactly how much yarn I had.  That was an eye opening and embarrassing experience.  It did slow the flow of yarn into the house.  I even revised that inventory a second time - only to discover that despite my best efforts, I couldn't knit faster than I could buy yarn.  But still I struggled manage this.  I deleted yarn vendor emails.  I stopped buying knitting books.  I didn't visit local yarn shops.  I only shopped for knitting patterns that would work for yarn already in my stash!!

But there were some exceptions to this 'yarn fasting.'   I did go to Yarn Fairs during the year - only 2 fairs and yarn was purchased there in very modest amounts (read: normal amounts for normal people.)  And when babies joined our family, cashmere, merino and silk just didn't seem quite right for children's clothes.  So acrylic yarns were added to my stash.  I also added a small amount of fat yarn to my stash - I needed a palette cleansing after almost a year of skinny yarns.  And in my defense, the acrylic and fat yarn did get used.

But then this month I saw this pattern.

Nuallan Cape by Jen Pierce
Knit Picks

Darn!!  I bought the pattern only - 'cause I love it.   I was sure I had something in my stash that this cape would work well in.   I didn't!!  Double Darn! So I went out to Knit Picks just to look at the yarn they used.  Knit Picks yarn is very reasonably priced, but I would need 2200 yards of it for my size.  That's a lot of yarn.  I hesitated.  I set the pattern aside.  I tried to forget about it for now.  I talked myself out of purchasing the yarn.  Focus, focus, focus.  You have enough yarn!

Then Knit Picks ran a 10% off sale on that very reasonably priced yarn - with free shipping.

Done!

The yarn is sitting my condo ... waiting and waiting!  *sigh*.

So ... to my children!!  I am very sorry that when I die you will have to plow your way through so much yarn at my death.  I will leave detailed instructions on how to proceed with clearing out this stash and getting it to good homes with loving knitters.  You might consider burying some of the better choice yarns with me and some knitting needles - just in case there is no yarn in heaven.

So sorry, so sorry.

In an effort to redeem myself, I will work on my list of project for 2020.  I will do my best to avoid these impulse purchases.  But I won't go into any 12-step program to fix this problem.  I just don't wanna!!  I will apologize over and over again - probably until the day I die.  And I will keep knitting.

Dear children.  So sorry.  Love, your mom!

Liberation, sort of

OK, 

I know this post is just a justification for my enormous stash of yarn

 amassed over the 21 years as a knitter!  

Truely, over those 21 years, I have chastised myself, inventoried, organized, chastised myself again, knitted with some, gave away some, bought some more, and collected some just because I couldn't walk away and not have a little of that beauty be mine ...  AND again chastised myself for this extravagance.

I am done with all that now! 

I own yarn.

I own a lot of yarn.

I will buy yarn again.

I own yarn that will outlive me

 because I can't possibly get it all knitted up before I die.

And
 to paraphrase our First Lady ...

I don't really care.

I have been liberated from all that self reflection and self criticism by a simple little book called A Stash of One's Own: Knitters on Loving, Living with, and Letting Go of Yarn, An anthology edited by Clara Parkes.

The synopsis:

• Anyone with a passion has a stash, whether it is a collection of books or enough yarn to exceed several life expectancies.  With her trademark wry, witty approach, Parkes brings together fascinating stories from all facets of stash-keeping and knitting life.  Whether the yarn stash is muse, memento, creative companion, career guide, or lifeline in tough times, the deeply engaging stories take a surprising and fascinating look at why we collect, what we cherish, and how we let go.

Yes, this is the book for me.  I think I can safely say that we are all collectors of some sort.   Some collect books, figurines, china, silverware, tools, jewelry, stamps, experiences, wine, steps (walkers with pedometers), kitchen equipment, music, games, baseball cards, travel mementoes, home canned veggies (admit it, you love seeing all those jars of canned tomatoes lined up), even beer cans!  Yes, beer cans.  During the 1970s we had a friend who had a wall display with all kinds of beer cans.  I don't think they even liked beer!

I think it is human nature to collect.

I have the actual book (not digital) in my small personal library of books.  I am the kind of person who writes in her books, uses stickers to find stuff again, dog ears pages and so on.  Some book collectors think that is a sacrilege to mar the book in anyway.  I hold a different opinion.  It shows this book was read, used, loved and important data highlighted for future reference.  It shows the book has function and value.  Isn't that what books are supposed to be?  A tool for knowledge.

Here are some quotes from this book that struck me (and my comments, of course.)

Essay: Stashers: Who the heck are we? by LelaNargi

• "What's the largest number of skeins anyone has tucked into their Ravelry stash? You will be either glad or very sorry you asked -- regardless, the owner is doubtless someone you'd like to cozy up to.  She or he is the proud stasher of 11,839 skeins of yarn; the next stasher in line has a still impressive 11,522 skeins in his or her collection."  
• I feel better all ready!  😁 I am no where near that level of collecting.

Isn't that beautiful yarn!
Well, let me tell you, it is a bear to knit with.
I have tried.  Now it is display/inspiration yarn!
Maybe someday I will find out exactly what it wants to be.

Essay:  Triptych by Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

• "Most of my yarn is for knitting, but some of it has a more complicated destiny as support staff: It is there to make me want to knit.  You bet I've had it for ten years, and I completely admit that it's a yarn pet.  I have no intention of every knitting it, but it's earning the real estate it takes up with how it makes me feel about knitting.  It is the textile artist's equivalent of a painting hung on the wall.  It's there to be beautiful and to help me dream of possibility."
• This is so true.  The artistry of some fiber dyers and the technique of blending fibers to create a yarn can be truly genius by some mom-and-pop fiber vendors.  It is like going to a farmer's market and seeing the perfect tomatoes - all plump and red and without blemish - and you can almost taste them - and they wind up in your basket costing you more than the ones in the grocery store - but ... oh, so much better.  Same with yarn.  The yarn I sometimes buy costs more than what you get at Michael's or Joanne's, but it is oh so much better.  

One of three book cases!

Essay:  Fear Not by Sue Shankle

• "I am a mental health clinician.  Let's get this out in the open right away:  I do not think having a big ol' curated stash is a problem.  Does anybody believe that Michelangelo just decided to carve the David one day and went out and bought a big slab of marble?  Heck no.  He had that thing sitting around for a long time before he even started.  Because he had to look at it, play with it, and possibly sniff it before he started work.  He planned that stuff.  That's what we artists do."
• I so love and agree this comment.  In fact, I am contemplating a rather large crochet project right now (probably 6,000 yards of yarn) using materials from my stash - that I previously purchased for sweaters.  Loved that yarn on sight, never found the right sweaters, never had the time, but now this new project calls to me and this yarn has the potential of being perfect for the task.  (More on that project another time.)

See?  Art!
I haven't tried sniffing it yet. 😏

I haven't finished reading this book - only halfway through.  It is an easy book to pick up and put down because it is devided into essays of a few pages each.  But so far it has been worth the time, marked all up with quotes I thought meaningful to me and will remain in my library as a reminder.

What reminder?  

I am normal!!

When the container drips

Have you ever had a feeling, a thought that keeps returning ... that seems to grow in size until action spills out?

Well, once again, I feel a need is growing.

When we moved into this condo all our worldly belongings fit!  Just fit!  I was amazed at the time that I 'guessed' correctly in downsizing from a large townhouse into this condo.  The decision of what would fit in a new abode was like trying to determine exactly which plastic food container to use when storing the chili that half fills your cook pot - and discovering the food container you picked held your chili perfectly - down to the last drop.  When I guess correctly with a food container, I feel like doing a fist bump with someone - except that the available  'someone' usually is my husband who would roll his eyes if I asked him to fist bump over chili in a Tupperware container!  Ha.

Now we are settled into the condo and every last drop of our stuff still fits despite increasing some of our things ... but the thought keeps growing that maybe we moved stuff we didn't really need to keep.

Yesterday my metaphysical food container - i.e. condo - tipped and dripped - the lid suddenly would not fit!

What started the drip?  My yarn.

I have a fairly large inventory of yarn.  It has been a 20 year collection in the making.  And I have loved every minute of it.  I moved all of my yarn from the townhouse to the condo.  I got rid of a lot of other things to be sure I had enough room for the yarn.  I don't separate easily from my yarn.

One yarn I purchased about 10 years ago.  It is a pretty nice acrylic with a small amount of wool.   I am not generally a fan of acrylic yarn, but these were very nice colors to my taste, machine wash and dry, and good for garments without looking cheap.  I purchased 4 complimentary colors  ... a total of 16 skeins (I don't do anything half way).  I didn't have a project in mind (always the kiss of death for me.)  Anyway, I started several projects with this yarn over the years but nothing stuck.  The yarn lingered in my stash.  The week I started (multiple starts actually) for a child's sweater in this yarn.  The yarn was perfect in weight, gauge and durability.  But no matter how I mixed and matched the colors - I didn't like how it was evolving.

The photo doesn't represent the problem well.
The brown and yellow sample
 - well the yellow reminded me of urine against the brown.
  I couldn't get passed that.
The rust color make the brown strips look green.
  Icky green.  How brown could look like green was beyond me.

 

And then the light dawned on me.

I began talking to this yarn - why do you look better wound up in the skein than worked up, why does everything I try with you fail, wouldn't you be happier with someone else, why am I keeping you????  It is time to set you free!!! (It is ok for you to roll your eyes now.)  I walked into the guest yarn room and put all 16 skeins of yarn in a bag for a charity donation.  It wasn't in a fit of frustration that I did this.  I was calm and deliberate. And I am ready to see if other yarn that resides with me would be happier owned by someone else.

Then I will start the process again to thin out my other belongings until the condo lid fits comfortably once again.

Increase, Decrease, Decrease 2016!

I am not much for resolutions!  In my experience a resolution is good for about 3 days and then it is broken.  I also hate starting anything on a traditional date when "everyone is starting something" - i.e. New Years Day.

It is just a trap, trap, trap!

But this year I am falling into the trap for 3 personal goals. Simply put - Increase, Decrease, Decrease.  I thought I would share them here, because a public admission (and a public flogging if needed) might help compliance beyond 3 days!  Ha!

Goals should be measurable.  Pledging to be a happier person is a wonderful life attitude to seek out, but as a goal ...  how do you measure improvement.  My goals are measurable and I have a tracking system set up.

So here goes with the public pronouncement.

Goal #1
I need to Increase my activity.  Man, I hate this goal.  I have started it over many many times on this.  But I keep trying.  The past year was my couch potato year.  I thought 2014 was miserable for me and 2015 was pretty much a loss as well.  2016 must be more active - mostly because this body I have must last me precisely another 38 years (more on that in goal #3) and at this rate it won't.

Goal #2
I need to Decrease the load my legs haul around each day.  Simply put - lose weight.  I hate this goal, too.  It is so trite and so common and usually so unsuccessful.  But my weight continues to creep up. Sitting on the couch in 2015 didn't help.  I don't care if I "look younger," but I want to feel more energetic.  And if I have another 38 years, it is a long time to feel this way.

Goal #3
Finally, this goal will make some of you smile.  I need to Decrease my yarn stash.  (the operative word is decrease.)  I don't actually hate this goal.  It is clear, however, that my yarn is secretly reproducing while my back is turned  I could not possibly be guilty of contributing to this obsession!  (I am going to have to answer to God at some point for all these lies!  But for now, lying works.)

Here is where the '38 years' comes into play.

• About 5 years ago I did a yarn inventory, noting type and yardage on an excel spreadsheet.  I owned about 140,000 yards of yarn.  Using a typical measure of knitting up 5,000 yards a year - I could knit for another 28 years without ever buying yarn!  I was appalled!!  Embarrassed actually.  I went on a yarn diet in that moment.  
• A few years later I updated my inventory and I was bouncing about 170,000 total yards of yarn.  Gads!!!  Epic yarn diet failure!!!  (That was when I decided that I should be buying only male or female yarn.  No more mixing up the sexes.  The yarn was showing no control!!)  I could now knit for another 34 years without buying yarn.  Unacceptable.
• This fall I updated my inventory - (and by now no one should be surprised) the total was up again.  I now own about 191,000 yards of yarn - and this is with regular knitting and giving away yarn since the last inventory.  Now everyone, all together ... how many years can I knit without buying yarn???       "38 years!"   Correct!  You all are so smart.  :-)    

But ...

Let's get real.

For the record

 I will be buying yarn again!!

  I have a love affair with the stuff. 

It is a hobby that lights up my life. 

I want my yarn stash numbers to decrease or at least stay the same.  This goal will be the hardest one of all.  Like all 'addicts,' I am reducing my yarn temptations. I stopped all knitting magazine subscriptions, I have 'unsubscribed' from all on line yarn vendors, and I am avoiding yarn stores. It is going to be tough, but my hobby should not take up one whole room in my house - and it does!

So welcome 2016!

The year of Increase, Decrease, Decrease!

Lesson Learned #4 - Stress and Stuff

  I've spent many precious life hours over the last 10 years moving stuff out of my house.  

In the last year, the highway of departing clutter has become an absolute speedway.  

Here is a lesson I have learned in the process.

Lesson Learned #4

Less stuff equals less stress ... at least for me.

For myself, I truly believe less stuff equals less stress.

But this may not be true for everyone.   I know folks who take comfort in being surrounded by all their many belongings.  In fact it is said that very creative people are usually surrounded by lots of disorganization, and they seem to function just fine.  I worked for a woman who hired me specifically because I was an organization greek.  She wanted me to organize her.  I discovered that although her office was crazy with clutter, she could easily put her hand on any item I could name.  Once she realized that her methods worked fine for her ... and my methods worked fine for me ... we got along famously!! Accepting each others differences made us a great team.

But an over abundance of stuff can have a very different outcome.

At the far end of the "stuff" spectrum is a popular show called The Hoarders.  It always made me a little sad to see these folks who allowed things to overtake their lives so completely.  Their stuff did not make them happy.  They were miserable.  I stopped watching when the show spilled into examples of animal hoarding layered on top of stuff hoarding.  Animals who had died in the house and the owners did not know because the stuff was so mountainous.  Cats who had litters of sick or dead kittens and the owners had no clue.  Sad was one thing.  Disturbing was something else.   I stopped watching.

I have never been near the level of clutter as the TV Hoarders.  But this week I was face-to-face with my own personally created clutter monster who was hiding in my yarn room.

For newer readers, a little bulleted background on me can demonstrate the problem.

• I am a knitter.
• I am a rigid heddle weaver.
• I am a sometimes fiber spinner.
• Crafters like me usually have stashes of craft related stuff.  
• I have a massive large medium small-ish to medium (???)  hoard stash collection selection of knitting yarns, weaving yarns, fiber for making yarns, books, knitting needles, binders of individual patterns, kits (knitting and weaving), many looms, many spinning spindles, and a full size spinning wheel.  (OK, "massive hoard" fits - just don't tell my husband.)
• My hobby once was housed in a small basement closet.  Then it was moved to a small room with closet (we call the den.)  Now it is contained in a moderate size bedroom (we now call "the yarn room") with 2 closets that once belonged to my mom.  I sort of maybe have my eye on largest room - our master bedroom.  I wonder if my husband would notice ... oh forget I said anything.
• I consider my yarn room to be a luxury and a joy.
• I LOVE LOVE LOVE my hobby.  

I think that sets the stage for you.

In preparation for painting the yarn room I had to MOVE . ALL . THE . LOVED . STUFF out of the closets and into the center of the floor so the closets could be painted. It took me a whole day.  It filled the center of the room and was stack about 4-5 feet high.  After I finished, I stood back and surveyed the stash.  It did not fill me with joy.  I was agitated.  I was discourage.  How could I allowed something I cherished to fall into the "too much stuff" category.

I have already started the process of thinning the stash.  There are no ugly items in the room.  But the stash does fall into two categories:  like and love.  The likes are finding their way to new homes where they will be loved.  And I am happy to make space for my loved items.

And what is true for my yarn room has been true for the rest of my house.  Space is good.  Less is good.

Less stuff is less stress - even if it is yarn.

Rooms with new names

I spent a lot of time thinking about selling our townhouse and moving to another smaller less expensive space.  Now that the old "homestead" houses just two old people, 2200 square feet of finished floor space seems way too big - especially when I am cleaning it.  After all, what do we need with 4 bedrooms and 3 1/2 bathrooms - plus a family room.

But once we determined that moving from a fully paid for home to somewhere else would be more expensive, I stopped focusing on the goal of moving and started thinking about what the heck I would do with the space. It didn't take long to come up with a plan.

The Guest Bedroom
I have always wanted a guest room.  Our "guest room" has always been our pull out couch in the living room and a queen size blow up mattress.  Both are less than perfect for sleeping and very unacceptable for company.  But that was what I had.

I still have that but now I also have this:

Although it isn't evident in the picture, the room needs painting, but it is OK for now.
The maple desk was my desk when I lived at home

I am particularly fond of these lighted flowers.  My daughter-in-law had a set
that I just loved and I had to have my own.
They make a wonderful muted night light.

And what room would be complete without a bull dog.  At least this one
doesn't have to be walked.  :-)

This guest bedroom is located right next to a full bathroom in the lowest level of our townhouse.  This room has changed names so many times it makes my head spin.

• my son's bedroom, 
• my daughter's bedroom when she moved back home one time (paint choice was hers)
• my son's bedroom again when he moved back home one time,
• my mother-in-law's bedroom (briefly) while she was in hospice in our home
• the downstairs den - with a treadmill and yarn stuff
• ... and then finally my son and daughter-in-law's room for about 10 months.  

It now sleeps three guests in actual beds.

Yeah!  Finally!!


The Den
This small bedroom room has really never changed names unless you consider that is was more of a "junk" room over the years.  Most recently it was also my mother's den for 5 years, and then briefly a shared space for my husband and I - my yarn and his computer.  My husband now has a simple uncluttered space for things that are important to him.  Uncluttered is the operative word since open space and free passage are important to anyone with his decreasing vision.

The Yarn Room
This bedroom has a short but varied history as well.

• Daughter's bedroom
• A nothing room for many years - I don't even recall what we did with the space.
• Mother's bedroom
• Temporary guest room but still filled with mom's stuff

After 2+ years in Assisted Living, I have finally reclaimed the space that was mom's.  This was a hard hard thing to do.  I knew she was unable to return, but for some reason I couldn't change the space - it was hers and would be so until she died.  At least that is what my mind was stuck on.

Now I realize that it isn't a good use of space.  Her bed has been moved into the guest room.  Her things have all been boxed up and moved into storage in the basement.  The room still has her furniture in it, but now it is filled with my yarn and hobbies.  And it is perfect for this use as it is the brightest room in my house.

This room deserves a small tour.

You see I have a whole lot of fiber just waiting to be spun.

I have a teddy that wears my very first knitted sweater - the sweater I made
during my learn to knit class in 1997.

And the wedding flowers I made for my son and daughter-in-law's wedding ...
they had nowhere to live either.

And Max, the now newly installed Yarn Cat who lives in my yarn room - he
also was homeless (well, not really.  He lives part time in my bedroom.  But the
story flows better if he seemed homeless.)

And the bed I bought for the yarn room and the "homeless" cat.

And the yarn that fills BOTH SIDES AND TOP TO BOTTOM in this closet.  It
was screaming for a permanent home!! In its last room it was spilling out of the closet
and onto the floor.  Now if I can only show restraint and stop buying yarn ...
(a wish that I have already broken with a purchase this month and a second purchase this month is on my radar.)
The only thing that might work to "cure" me would be some kind of an "intervention."
But I will go down fighting with my pointy sticks if I have to!!!
You have been warned!!!

So now all these wonderful items now live in my yarn room.
I love my yarn room.

LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this crafty cluttered space that is just mine.

Hope you enjoyed the tour.

One last yarn-y stash post: a question!

Picture credit: www.galenfrysinger.com

No, this is not my yarn stash!  

But this is what my yarn stash feels like and resembles on occasion.  And this is what I spent time trying to fixing this week.

My current organizational system is not even as systematic as this picture, but I do try to get it all to fit in one full size closet.  When new yarn comes into the house, it gets stacked on a card table until it can be logged in Ravelry and I have time to problem solve where it will go. The card table is just a temporary option.  You see I share that room with my husband who visits daily to work on his computer.  When he enters the room everything usually looks, well ... normal.  The yarn stash is mostly not visible.  

He knows better than to open the closet (he did that only once and quickly slammed it closed before he lost control of the contents and needed to send out an SOS!)  As long as my hobby stays safely contained in a confined space that is seldom viewed, he can claim plausible deniability.  His wife is still normal and may need to (on occasion) buy more yarn.  :-)

Really ... he is mentally just fine, but "out-of-sight, out-of-mind" plays big in our house.

It is a method that works for us!

But back to the storage issues:  I did manage to get all my cotton yarn together (gosh I have a lot of cotton yarn,) all my weaving yarn together (ditto on the weaving yarn), and all my wool fiber together.  Oh, that's right.  I haven't talked about my wool fiber stash! Once I am spinning will be  ... wait for it ... yarn! (See why I didn't talk about it?)

All the other skeins are stored wherever there is a space in the closet plastic drawers or in plastic bags squeezed in spaces between the drawers.  I try to make sure I use bags that you can see through - so I don't have to dig too far to find stuff. Plastic may save me from the horrors of a stray moth setting up housekeeping in my collection. (Dread beyond measure!)

But as a "Collector" of yarn, this storage system seems chaotic and disrespectful to my stash.

I would love to hear how you manage your storage of anything - we all store stuff, we all have our methods, even if you aren't a yarn hoarder collector like me.  How do you do it?  What are the challenges you have and what have you done to overcome it?

Knitting and a Confession

I am a knitter!  I dabble in a number of other fiber related crafts - but if I could choose exactly one activity to be stranded with me on an isolated tropical island ... it would be knitting.  I wouldn't be able to wear any of my creations because tropical islands are hot and knitting produces warm garments but no matter!

That is not my confession.

This year I have several project goals - all of them are pretty big.

I finished my mom's shawl. The story of why this shawl was pushed to the top of my project list can be found at this post.  It just needs a few ends woven in and blocking.  I wish this was a shawl that I could leave with mom all the time - but Assisted Living laundry is unforgiving.  Everything gets cleaned using much heat and agitation - which is 'death' to wool.  So the shawl will make periodic visits only.  I am still thinking about buying some beautiful acrylic for a shawl that she can keep with her - but extending my project list is a low priority ... and buying more yarn is not ... *sigh* ... well, more about that later.

This is also not my confession.

My daughter's lace shawl (with fingering weight yarn and #1 needles - (yes, #1 needles - who the heck makes a shawl out of toothpicks - and before you say - use bigger needles - the pattern suggested #0 needles - insane I say!!!) .... anyway, I get distracted.  My daughter's lace shawl was about 8 inches in depth when I decided that:  1)  I couldn't live with the small errors I had made,   2) that I would always see those irregularities and be bothered by them,   3)  that I would forever cringe when Kris would proudly tell people that her mother made the shawl,  4) that is OK to be anal and want perfection.  So I ripped it all out and started again.  Here is my second try.

And just for the record:  I am an Aries.  That means I am stubborn, bull headed, persistent and ornery.  I have no intention of letting this thread-like yarn and tiny tiny needles best me!

I have also started a Faery Ring jacket for my cousin, Leslie.  It is in the beginning stages but the process has begun.

All together now ... no, this is not her confession.

There are two other projects - my own sweater and a pair of socks - that are on the needles, but are not picture worthy yet.  There are a few other projects on my list, but they are not even close to getting cast on the needles.

Now for the confession.

My yarn stash!  

For my non-knitting readers: a yarn stash is a bunch yarns (or fibers, or cloth ...) that is owned by you but not presently being used.  It might have projects assigned to them, or it might be yarn that you just had to own because you physically could not walk away from it.  Most knitters have a stash of yarn.  Most knitters have enough years left in their lives to use up their stash of yarn.

Then there is me!

About 2 years ago I did an inventory.  I listed the yarn by maker, weight, and color - I also noted how many yards I had of each entry.

Two years ago that yardage number was 143,000 yards - (pause for gasps).  For non-knitters that is about 79 miles of yarn (the gasps grow in volume).  And based on using about 5,000 yards of yarn a year (equal to about 2 sweaters and several smaller projects), I would have enough yarn to last me 28 years even if I never bought another skein of yarn (pause for a belly laugh - mine, of course.)  I was however, appalled at the quantity of yarn I had amassed.  It was a bit embarrassing.  The total would slowed my acquisition of yarn!  I was glad I did the inventory.

One year ago I updated my inventory - deleting yarns I had used and adding new ones.  Remarkably my yardage total was now 156,000+ yards or 88 miles of yarn.  That is an increase of 13,000 yards.  13,000 YARDS more yarn!!  GASP!  Just not possible!  Now I could live another 31 years without running out of yarn - (time for math:  I was 65 then so I wouldn't run out until I was 96 years old.)  I did some soul searching.  If that yarn was not developing gonads (I haven't entirely ruled that out yet) and increasing yarn babies on its own - then I had bought all those 13,000 yards.

So I did the only reasonable thing I could think of.  I decided that I was no longer a stasher of yarn - I was a "collector" of yarn.  That sounded so much better.  Yes, a Collector - with a capital C!  I would still be cautious in my purchases, but as a serious "Collector", I was "normal" (an important word) - adding only unique selections to my "collection."

Normal!

(Is anyone else "buying" my assessment of this yarn stashing problem?)

This week I updated my inventory again.  (I really need to stop doing that!)

Let see hands of how many think the inventory has gone down (great wasteland of silence!)

You are right, it went up.

Let see hands of how many think the inventory increased less than before (great wasteland of silence!!)

You are right, it went up alot!  (and I hate that you knew this!)

Drum roll please.

My current inventory of yarns is 188,475 yards, 107 miles of yarn ... I could live to be 104 years old before I run out of yarn.  HOLY COW!  I increased my yarn from last year by 34,475 yards!  (and secretly I think I missed a few yards in this count - but whose counting, right?)

I am now past "soul searching."  That was a worthless endeavor. I am now in survival mode.  I am still just a Collector (yes, I am), but if I reach 200,000 yards by this time next year - I will need to change my title from Yarn Collector to Yarn Store Owner or Hoarder!

I vote for Yarn Store Owner - a unique yarn store where I don't sell any of my inventory.  Yes, that is it!  A unique store owner that does not sell stuff!!

Unique is still normal, right?

*sigh*

Well, that is all for now.  Need to get knitting.

Also need to shop for some nice acrylic yarn for my mom's shawl!

(Oh my, did I say that out loud?)

Kiparoo Farm

Don't you hate it ... when you discover a vendor you patronize ... a vendor with a charming name for their business ... a name that triggers memories of an idyllic setting ... a name that in your mind's eye you want to visit to just get away ... don't you hate it when you find out that this vendor is not anything like the name they have picked???

Well ...

that is most definitely not the case with Kiparoo Farm. 

Kiparoo Farm is even better than my mind's eye imagined.  My sister and I made the trip to visit Kiparoo Farm this past weekend.  This is an actual working farm where sheep graze and cows are milked.  And it is only about one hour from my house.

Kiparoo Farm

Annie Kelley

3511 Bussard Road

Middletown, MD 21769

301-371-7454

kiparoofarmstudio.us

I have been a yearly visitor to their fair stand at The Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival.  I own a lovely selection of their yarns.

This wonderful farm is located in rural Maryland. 

The farm house serves as the home and studio for Annie Kelley who is the owner of the Kiparoo Farm yarn brand.  The yarn is from her sheep.  She freely talks about her life as a farmer - and as a milker of cows.  And her enthusiasm for her life and craft is infectious!

This farm dates back to the 1700s and she says there is actually one very dilapidated building on the grounds from that time.  The farm house was built in the 1800s.

 She is surrounded by beautiful rolling farm country.

The first floor of the house has 3 rooms that serve as her studio.  

But through all the windows, glimpses of the farm can be seen.  

Of course, for knitters like my sister and I, the yarn is the star of the show.  

One of my favorites is her Silk Road - 50% Marino Wool, 50% Silk.

  There is little that compares to the feel of this yarn.

The colors of this yarn were so much better in person!
Darn camera!

It goes without saying that I bought some yummy yarn.

  A wonderful cotton called Celtic Cotton now has a new home with me.

  The moment I saw it I knew that some of this great stuff was going to be mine.

This cotton is machine wash and dry.  It is spun around a central core that prevents the cotton from sagging - something that cotton is prone to  do.

All of her yarns have pattern support - and samples of the patterns are on display in the studio.

The basic patterns are well written and attractively presented.

 The farm even has a mission statement ...

Amazingly, I did not get any pictures of the sheep or the cows!  Go figure!  But I know I will be making this trip again and will correct that omission.  It would be a wonderful day trip when my cousins come to visit.

Thank you Annie Kelley for your gracious assistance - spending much precious time away from your farm duties with my sister and I.  Our visit was memorable.

Family and Yarn - a dynamic combo!

This weekend I am heading up to visit my cousins in Pennsylvania for a family weekend and I am so looking forward to it.  Sunday we are getting on a bus and going to Rhinebeck - New York's Sheep and Wool Festival.  I am pretty stoked about that!

This is also the weekend I pick up my new loom (new to me) - a larger size from the one I currently have, with a stand.  This was a real buy - less than half price off a new one and only used a few times.  Also stopping on my way up into Pennsylvania to visit a cousin-in-law for lunch!

A full and fun-filled weekend.  See you on the other side of it!

With pictures, of course.

Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival

I wait eagerly all year for this event.  

The 2013 Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival is on my calendar already.

This fair is both wondrous and intense, exciting and refreshing, overwhelming and surprising.

For me it all begins with family.  The pictures tell the story. 

The day before we knit and snacked,
and one of us (my future daughter-in-law)
 worked on her dissertation.

Ipad and an Apple Computer shared the table with yarn.

I noticed when I loaded these pictures,
my daughter appeared to be "lecturing."
 Gosh, I wonder what deep serious topic we were on.

Oh, we also shared the table with Whipped Cream flavored Vodka.
 It was yummy!

Most of our fun events start with and end with family.  I am blessed big time in this regard.  Friday was Family Day at our house - crafts, sharing, visiting, dinner - it was the best way I can think of to launch my favorite weekend of the year.

Saturday began early for my cousin and me.  We arrived at the Fair Grounds 30 minutes before opening, but things were already in full swing!  I felt like we were late instead of early.

Here we are at lunch.
We even had a shephard's crook
 (something she was getting for a friend back home.)

The crowds here were thin, but it picked up late morning.

Decorations were everywhere.  Sheep-themed, of course.

The food was wonderful.

The art work magnificent.

Every fiber-knitting-crochet-weaving-spinning book
 you could think of was there.

If you couldn't find the right button at the fair
you weren't trying.

Vendors were helpful.

Show time!  Put your best hoof forward!

"Ahh, who is playing with my back end?:

Spinning wheels and tools of all kinds were everywhere.

An unusual looking loom!

And the YARN, hugely important to us fiber enthusiasts.

And don't forget the center piece of the fair - the sheep!

This year my cousin and I spend time
 visiting and admiring these wonderful creatures.

Now here is a handsome boy!

This one, too.

Standing in their food was a common theme. :-)

The parking lot was packed in ALL DIRECTIONS!  

Till next year!

Next blog post will be about what I brought home from the fair.