Mark Twain

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do ...
Explore. Dream. Discover." Mark Twain

Monday, August 31, 2020

No ... I didn't get a picture ... but I SWEAR it happened!!

That Aja.  

Just when I think she has stopped evolving, she surprises me.

I know I have been absent from my blog for over a month.  It has been a busy summer and there was just no time.  But things are slowing down now and just today, a miracle happened.

I mean we have seen a number of smaller miracles in her short time with us.

Over all, she does a lot that tells me she is happy to be with us.  She likes to rub against us, she enjoys a short scratch or rub around her cheeks and neck, and she joins us for short visits into the living room, kitchen or dining room.  Home base is still our bedroom, of course.  But she always runs out of the bedroom to welcome us when we come home.  She is very interested in her meals, escorting us in a "short parade" from the kitchen to the cat food trays in the bedroom and enjoys looking out the bedroom windows at the birds and people.  Small miracles all ... considering how stressed out she was when she arrived 3 months ago.

But she still has her limits.  Does she let me pick her up?  Oh, no.  Does she come into the living room and sleep on the furniture or visit with guests?  Nope. Does she want to cuddle with us?  Most definitely not!  And just last week I attempted to place her on my lap!  I told my husband that she probably will never be a lap cat! No matter.  She gives what she can and we are happy to oblige her.

And then today she came out into the living room - arrived at my chair

 and jumped onto my lap!  

It wasn't entirely a relaxed action.  She was resting on her feet for about 20 seconds. I tried to act like she did this every day.  Ha! And then she settled down on her side and let me rub her cheeks.  And she was purring.  At some point I pulled my hand away to rest on the arm of the chair - and she hissed and smacked my hand with her paw.  I have learned that this hiss reaction means one of 2 things:  Don't stop!  or Stop! So I started scratching her cheek again.  And then after another minute, I could tell she was ready for me to stop.  I pulled my hand away again.  And after about another 30 seconds she jumped down with a parting hiss.  That hiss in most cats is a warning sign of significance.  But not in Aja.  It is just like another way of talking along with her chirps and purrs and meows!  It all fits into the context of what is going on - whether is is negative or positive.

She is a complicated lady!  

Tuesday, July 7, 2020

Some of this ... some of that!

For some reason getting a post published lately to this blog has been difficult.  My days have gotten busier I guess.


Recently family time has increased.  Not seeing my adult kids and my grand baby really began to weigh heavy on me.

My son and his wife work from home now and having a 2 year old around make for difficult productivity.  So I have been spending 3 days from 9 until 2-ish, at their house playing with Esk.

Here she is 'cooking."  I love seeing her use her imagination.  She really does imitate what she sees.

And, of course, there is swing time in the yard.  They recently moved to a larger house and with that move came more space inside and out.  There is a lovely swing set in the yard.  Esk loves to swing.  She is big on saying "faster, faster, faster" until she is going as high as the swing allows.  And if she doesn't think she is high enough, she gets grumpy!  

She also loves to play hide-and-seek - her own version of the game, of course.  Her favorite spot to hide (her only spot to hide) is under the covers in the center of her parents' bed, then she tells me to go to her bedroom - which is down the hall.  Then I am instructed to come back and 'find' her.  She doesn't grasp the fact that I helped hide her.  😂😂😂😂 It is hysterical.

So as I walk down the hall from her bedroom to 'find' her, our game goes something like this:

Me:   Where is Esk?  I can't seem to find her.

Esk:  (no sound)

Me:   Is Esk in this bathroom?  I don't see her.

Esk:  (no sound)

Me:   Is Esk in this closet?  Nope, not there!! (as I get closer to her parents' bedroom.)

Esk:  (little giggle)

Me:   Is Esk in her parents' bedroom?  hmmm ... I don't know.

Esk:  (more giggle and a little shake of the blanket)

Me:   Maybe I should check under the bed!  Or maybe daddy's closet!  Or maybe mommy's bathroom!

Esk:  (small squeal and squished down to make her bump smaller)

Me:   Or maybe, just maybe ... she is under this COVER!!!  (Lifting the cover to reveal her.)

Esk:   (Big squeal and laughter.). Esk want more hide!!!  Help me grandma!  

And when I suggest that it is my turn to hide, she is most distraught - so the game is really Esk Hide and Grandma Go Seek! 

I'll play the game anyway she wants!!
We are keeping the social distancing bubble in place by associating only with those who have minimal contact with others. So far that has worked well for my son, daughter and daughter-in-law. 


Aja's personality is becoming more known over time.  She is friendly.  She purrs.  She loves her food! She talks all the time.  And when she is not happy, we are getting better at reading her body language. (A very important skill.  Ha!)

She loves her bed by the window!!
I think she has even put on a little weight.

She lets you pet her (within reason ... within "her reason" ... so knowing when to stop is important.)  She is exploring the condo more and more.  But holding her in your arms or on your lap is not high on her list ... yet.  She is learning to live with 2 humans in her "family," but not big on company of others - human or dogs (although she seems to like my daughter.)  

Yep!  She is on my bed - even without an invite!  

We have taken to calling her "our little diva."  Just like a "diva"we try to judge her 'boundaries' - giving her just enough but not too much of anything.  

That expression says "Yep!  I own this bed, too!! 😍

It has been hugely helpful to be in semi-regular contact with her first "mom."  I discovered just last week that Aja's birthday was in July 2016 - meaning she is just now turning 4.  Occasionally touching base with this lady has made Aja less of a mystery to us.  We are very lucky to have made contact!  Aja's previous mom has been our "user's manual" for this feline!!


Low level stress with the pandemic, the combative political climate (an election year) and the heart- breaking images of the race issues has a been a constant. 

In some ways the rise of personal cells phones has made it clear just how ugly the underbelly of our country is right now.  And that is a good thing!  You can't change a problem if you don't think there is a problem.  Changing our leadership in November is the first step.  No ... let me correct that.  The first step is peaceful protest!  Which is our right!! And a LOT of it.  The second step is getting leaders in place that will correct all the wrongs of the last 4 years.  There is a lot of work to do.

But how to de-stress from all the terrible events of 2020!!  

I always seem to fall back on "making space in my environment."  Declutter!  Nothing else does that trick for me.  Not even knitting.  Spending so much time at home now - thinning the belongings has become a regular routine rather than a single seasonal binge event.  It started with downsizing my yarn stash which began to feel like a burden.  If you had told me 10 years ago that too much yarn would be burden, I would have thought you insane.  But as time has passed that thought weighs on me ... I couldn't possibly live long enough to knit it all.  And that mind set spreads into other areas of the condo.  Each day I put one bag together of stuff and carry it out of the condo to ... somewhere!  Ironically finding ways to donate stuff during this pandemic has been challenging now that Good Will is closed.  Thankfully I found a Church Thrift Shop not too far from my condo - and they are happy to receive new "inventory." And as I have discovered many times before, I seldom think about the things I get rid of ... once they are gone... so how important were they anyway??


This virus is going to be with us a long time.  Building habits now on what can be sustained is how I  think about this summer.

What I can sustain is:
  1. Hands washing, hand sanitizer, social distancing and masks
  2. Small groups only of folks who follow #1
  3. Eating carry out - no eat in restaurants
  4. Being content with home based pursuits  
Since I don't work outside the house - those 4 points are do-able.  What I can't maintain is keeping a 'sterile field' in my home like I did in March.  Sanitizing all the groceries that came into the house, wiping down frequently touched surfaces in my house every single night, using disposable gloves all the time - too much, too much too much!  

Certainly everything carries some risk - but building habits that you can consistently do for a year and half or more - is the goal for me.   Getting burned out by living in a sterile bubble and breaking that bubble for "one fun filled weekend" - like some have done - well, it just doesn't make sense.  As one reporter stated, it takes just one exposure at a bar - during one fun night - to undo all the things you did for months previously. 

Nope!  Not me.  Especially when people are still dying such miserable and lonely deaths at such high rates.

So that is my This and That for now!

Friday, June 12, 2020

Unveiling Aja - Chapter 3 - Little Victories

One morning, as my body began the process of waking, I turned over in my bed and saw THIS!!

Seriously, I couldn't believe my eyes.  Aja, laying in the bed we bought for her.  I slowly reached for my glasses on the night stand.  She looked over her shoulder at me.  I froze not wanting to disturb this little victory.  She returned to sleep.  Even with my glasses on she was STILL there.  I wanted a picture.  I needed a picture.  I slowly reached for my phone and as I drew it towards my body, she looked over her shoulder at me again.  I froze again -  my eyes closed pretending to sleep.  She set her head down again.  

I then took about 20 pictures of a cat that was not moving one little bit!!  Hahaha! Never in my wildest dreams did I even think I would get such a sense of joy from seeing a sleeping cat.  After all, sleeping is what cats are masters at.  I have 50 years worth of cat sleeping images in my brain!!  But none gave me a feeling of success, like that image.

                                                And then there was today - she did THIS!!!!

Yes, she is laying beside me on the bed.   She still keeps to our bedroom normally, so periodically I go in the bedroom and spend time with her.  Today I pulled back the covers of my bed and sat on the mattress.  She has become confident enough to jump up and sit by me, but today was the first time she laid down beside me.  Another victory.

She won't jump to my lap when I sit in the chair.  She did that exactly twice on her own.  And when I lift her onto my lap she doesn't seem comfortable and sometimes hisses letting me know, "Not now!!"  So I have stopped trying to lift her or hold her.  She just isn't ready for that.  But laying beside me was a pretty big step for her.  Relaxed enough to lay on her side.  I will say her tail was wagging a bit - like she knew this action was new with me and she was feeling a bit unsure.  But she stayed for about 10 minutes.  And then she jumped down. 

I am still learning!

The first few weeks I made all the advances with her.  Half the time she was receptive and half the time she wasn't.  In the last few weeks I have let her make all the moves.  She needs to seek me out - and she does.  That method has worked very much better.  What I REALLY want to do is pick her up and give her a great big hug!  But I resist as I know that would end in disaster.  And my goal is to avoid disasters - and even hissing episodes!  Bonding is the goal and trust takes time.  Peace is the path to both.  And I love this little lady enough to do all the steps her way.

I keep forgetting.  Its been only 5 weeks.  We are on Aja's time schedule and not mine!  And she likes it that way.  Now that this approach is bearing fruit - I like it that way as well!

Wednesday, June 3, 2020

Unveiling Aja - Chapter 2 - Two Steps Forward. One Back. Repeat.

I have come to the conclusion that of the 10 cats that previously shared our lives,
 Aja is the only one who was raised to be an actual cat!  😁
  All our other cats came to us as kittens
 and although we didn't realize it at the time, 
I am kind of thinking we probably raised them to be dogs! haha.

Sorry for the poor quality!  Aja, hunkered down under the bed!
That look is not "trusting."  Ha!  She had good reason.
Last weekend was hard on her.

First off, the weather was beautiful and cool.  Our air conditioner was off and our bedroom windows were wide open.  The curtains were billowing with a wonderful breeze.  The road noise (and we have some road noise), is a constant to our ears at times.  So constant that we just don't hear it anymore unless it is a noisy motorcycle or a fire truck - but Aja hears every sound.  And the billowing curtains???  Her look was "My Gosh!! Are they supposed to do that??"

Sunday, when I entered the bedroom and called for her - she didn't come.  I think I was getting the cat equivalent of a cold shoulder.  I checked under the bed.  No Aja.  I checked in the bathroom and under the rocker and under the dressers.  No Aja!  My little 'worry worm' started.  I checked my husband's closet. No Aja.  Finally I moved his shirts on the lower level ... and there she was - snuggly hidden from the dog (more on him later,) and the street noise, and the breeze and the curtains.  Poor baby.  I wanted to pick her up in my arms and reassure her.  But I knew it was too early in our relationship for such familiarities.

She spent most of Saturday and Sunday in my husband's closet.  I shut everything down Sunday night. It got quieter.  She got calmer.  Later I opened one bedroom window .... two inches only.  Air and some noise was allowed in but not at the same level as the weekend.  I know with time she will adjust to all this - because this is part of her reality now and there is really no choice -  but currently - she is not fan.

How can you not love a sweet old face like this one!

Then there is this old guy!  

Milo, my daughter's French Bull Dog - one of my grand babies.  He had been here since Thursday and returned home Monday.  He only looked at her through the gate - never barked.  But his presence has been worrisome for her.  Milo can't get past the gate so the protective space barrier was solidly in place.  She calmed a bit.

This morning I moved the new donut bed into the area of the closet she likes to hide.  That was a mistake!  She decided she doesn't like me messing with her hiding places.  Now she is back under the bed.

Her hissing responses increased in a really schizoid-like way.  She rubs against my legs purring, back and forth watching out the bedroom door, then she smells my hand (I am sure Milo's scent is on me), she hisses and then turns and rubs against my legs again, then hisses, and repeat.  She is very confused.  I look and sound the same, but my smell is not quite right. I go and wash my hands. She calms. How to explain all this to her.  I thought I was speaking "cat" all this time, but maybe I was actually speaking "dog," and she speaks only "cat."  All my previous cats apparently understood "dog." *sigh* - have I totally lost you all yet?

Or maybe, there are just gaps in my understanding!  Yes, that is it.  I need more educating.

So I spent time on Amazon looking at cat behavior books and found this one, highly rated, current and focused on feline behavior.

Image from Amazon
This is the way I love to hold my cats!
Bet Aja would think this is too familiar. 
The book is authored by Jackson Galaxy - a cat behaviorist and Mikel Maria Delgado, Phd, a behavior consultant for Feline Minds at the Davis School of Veterinary Medicine.  Apparently Jackson hosts an Animal Planet hit show and is the author of other books related to cats.  Mikel studied animal behavior and human-animal relationships at the University of California, Berkeley.  This book had the focus on behavior I was looking for - rather than just dedicating one chapter to behavior and other chapters all other cat care topics.


I also downloaded a few free Kindle offerings.  I am determined to not make too many backward steps with Aja.

Then I checked the calendar!  She has been with us just about 4 weeks.  Only 4 weeks!  Gosh ... I have heard adjustment time spans of up to 18 months!!  Maybe I am just rushing things.  Maybe I am speaking "cat" after all - and she doesn't like what I am saying.

Maybe I am over thinking this!!  

Oh well, can't hurt to check out a few references.

Post Script:  Just before publishing this post, two major Aja advancements happened.

Aja left the safety of under the bed and rubbed up against my husband's legs.  Let me tell you!!  THAT made his month!  I knew ignoring her would produce a positive reaction.  Cats typically seek out anyone they 'think' doesn't like them.  It is one of the signature traits of felines - across the full spectrum of the cat world.  A little reverse psychology works wonders.

And around dinner time she walked right out the bedroom and made her way into the living room - in front of us - while we were eating dinner at the table.  I cautioned my husband:

No sudden moves or loud noises,
no coughing, sneezing, 
or swallowing that food you put in your mouth
 ...  just act natural ... 
maybe stop breathing for a minute or two while she checks things out!!  😀

And she did just that!  She walked right up to my husband's chair and did her side rub back and forth!  A typical cat method of sharing their scent on things to "make it their own."  It lasted for all of 5 minutes!  But, hey, that was brave, brave, brave on her part.  And after she ran back into the bedroom I told her that!!

So maybe I don't need a book.  Maybe I am speaking "cat!"  Or maybe she is learning "dog!"

Or maybe we are just developing a new language between us ... 
Aja Language!

I sure do love this crazy cat! 

Sunday, May 31, 2020

Unveiling Aja

Our journey with Aja has been like a grand "unveiling."
A slow, deliberate lifting of the veil
 she uses to cover her personality.

She is a beauty!

You see, when you adopt a kitten, there is no veil or curtain.  It is all typically about play and adventure and wonder and fun and discovery and cuddles and sometimes mistakes and craziness.  Kittens are "all out there."  Being cautious lasts about 5 or 10 minutes.  Tops!  Finding your 2 pound fur ball hanging from a curtain rod or off your jeans (while you are wearing them, of course) or pitifully caught in a tight place, or darting between your legs in sudden fits and starts ... all of that is just Kittenhood 101!

Favorite spot!

Adopting an adult cat is none of that.  It more like studying for a Phd without books or lectures and Cliff Notes.  You don't even get a syllabus or an advisor.  Adopting an adult cat is like purchasing a "surprise package" where you don't know what's inside the box until you open it up.  And the first order of business is gently picking the virtual scotch tape off the wrapping paper without upsetting the contents (otherwise known as 'the cat.')  And that is where we started with Aja.

The first thing she shared with us was how talky she is.  Many meows, trills, purring, short little squeak sounds that have meaning only to her at present. And she loves to be talked to!  All that aside, she isn't shy at setting you straight with a hiss, either.  Although we have no rules when it comes to cats, she apparently has a few rules when it comes to owners.  Haha!  Good thing I am a fast learner!!

Husband spending time trying to make friends.
Look at her beautiful markings.

The next discovery was the sinuous rubbing of her body against our legs.  She loves to do that.  She is friendly - in the extreme at times - happy to be scratched around the cheeks and ears and neck.  And when she has had enough - She Is D-O-N-E.  And don't ask for more.  It's her time table - not yours.  When her 'happy dance' is over, she is on to other things.

Gate is wide open - but unless it is dark and quiet - she typically
won't come out.  At least not yet.  Can't help but wonder
was is going on in that tiny mind of hers.

But as the owner, it is important that I control the narrative (or at least give the illusion that I am in control. 😆)  For example - lifting her onto the bed, onto her cube by the window, and onto my lap has shorten the time she would take to do these things independently on her own.   The first time doing anything she is tense and anxious.  Her picture is in the dictionary next to the word CAUTIOUS!  Tail is intensely whipping back and forth, eyes darting every which way before she jumps down. But within a short time she spontaneously returning to that scary "whatever" and shows off her mastery of it ... acting like it is no big deal!  Ha!

One of her beds - the cube.  A hiding place and a perch place in one.

She still sleeps under our bed!  *sigh*   My other cats never used a cat bed. Their bed was where we slept and they graciously shared 'their bed' with us.  Maybe she will do that someday, but 'someday' could be a ways off.  So I bought 2 pet beds.  One bed is the donut shape placed in my husband's closet (she visits there), and the other one is the cube that functions like a bed she can hide in and perch on while watching out the window.  She has checked out both, but use them??  Not to sleep in.  She still creeps under the bed.  The vet said to give her time. My friend who has homed feral cats said the same thing.  It may take her 18 months to sleep in one of those beds.  Or maybe never.  Cats do what they want to do, when they want to do it. and how they want to do it.

Half the time she looks out - and half the time she looks in.

She loves sitting on our window sills.  Since she is half the weight of our other big male cats - her little butt actually fits on our window sill.  Half the time she is watching out our windows at the world outside ... and half the time she is looking at the world inside!  I guess we haven't gotten boring yet.

Poor picture due to night lighting, but she is on the left technically
in our kitchen which is right outside the
bedroom door to the left.

Another poor lighting picture.  She is looking into the den
which is right outside our bedroom door to the right.

Her current big adventure is the condo space beyond our her bedroom.  Under her own steam she has stepped outside the bedroom almost every day for the last week ... a few inches more each time.  Usually she makes these forays when the house is very quiet and dark, and we are quietly reading.  But yesterday I was standing in the kitchen (during the bright light of day, TV blaring, and microwave humming - you know - normal stuff) and I looked down and found her almost standing in the kitchen.  We were both surprised.  Her eyes were huge like saucers - mine too!  Then the ice maker did its thing and dropped a load of ice in the bin!!   Too much, too much, too much!  Gone.  Being female, (and the business end of the species,) she knows instinctively that monsters may live out there!  Can't be too careful - that is clearly a motto tattooed in her tiny cat brain!

Milo, my French Bulldog 'Grandson' looking into the bedroom at  Aja.

Aja acting causal as she carefully extracts herself from
under the rocking chair while being observed by

This weekend we raised the level of excitement a bit.  My daughter's French Bulldog, Milo, came for a visit.  As you can imagine, Aja was not amused.  There was a return to hissing and tail swishing!  All behind the safety of her gate and under the rocking chair.  She stayed in her "safe zone" while Milo peaked in through the bars. Milo is an old guy and has little interest in cats.  He just wanted a look-see!  After a few hours she settled down.  She made the connection that the gate protected her from the "monster" that had just arrived.  Now she sits calming staring out at him.  Maybe one day she will be as comfortable as Wally was with Milo.

Feeding time.  She gets both dry and wet. Initially we weren't sure
what she preferred to eat.  Now we now she likes wet food
but snacks on dry.  My husband is the feeder - his
effort to make friends with Aja - who is still very unsure about him.

She still seems to favor me, much to my husband's chagrin.  The last 2 cats favored my husband.  He doesn't give up easy and keeps trying to win her over.  I tell him to just ignore her.  Cats can't stand to be ignored!  If you try too hard, they can't be bothered.  So he is doing his best to give her space and time.  And he is the official feeder!  You know, just to show off his good side to Aja.  Meanwhile, she is all over me!  Haha! Another truism about cats - they pick their people and you have no say in the matter.

She like the little laser light (left little bright spot on the carpet.)

Her first visit to the vet was May 22.  We anticipated a "betrayal of the shaky trust" we had carefully nurtured.  Cats normally don't equate good vet care with loving pet ownership. But we do.  As it turns out it wasn't that scary a trip for her.  I had to stay in the parking lot, of course, pandemic protocols, so she had to brave the vet's office on her own.  Apparently she did fine.  I warned them that she is a hisser and a smacker when anxious, but not known to be aggressive.  And sure enough the vet got one of each after micro chipping her!!  Our vet agreed with the shelter and our assessment that she was not aggressive.  Just frightens easily. The ride in the car was uneventful.  That is a big improvement over Wally who would vomit all over the inside of his carrier and yowl the whole trip.  Poor boy!  Nerves and maybe car sick.  Not her!  Not a sound.  Considering she hisses at a bunch of little things and 'talks' up a mean-streak at home, I was surprised the car ride was so quiet.  She looked all around! (Monsters could be anywhere you know!!)

She has finally got comfortable enough to pose and let me take pictures of her.

Finally, I had the good fortune to communicate with her previous owner.  The Surrender Form included that information.  Since Aja was a mystery wrapped up in orange fur, I wanted to know more.  I plugged the owner's name into Facebook on the off chance I could find her.  Success!  I took a chance and shot off an email. I know that some might have not appreciate a message from the new owner.  But I wanted to share that Aja landed in a good home and was doing well.  Thankfully, she did respond and was very happy to hear from me. She was grateful that Aja was with us - patient and experienced cat parents.  Although she had to give Aja up due to a distance move, she had kept tabs on her through the shelter website and knew she had been adopted.  Not knowing how Aja was doing was hard.  Hopefully now Aja's first 'mom' has some peace of mind about Aja's future. And for me, it was nice to have confirmation that the Aja I am getting to know is pretty much unchanged from her former life and that she had a good home with her previous 'mom.'  I invited her to visit this blog occasionally to keep up with Aja as she begins her new life with me.

"OK, I am done for today!  Please go away now!"  hahaha

As each day that passes, Aja is a little less of a mystery.  We are past the 'virtual scotch tape and wrapping paper' stage.  We have opened the lid to look carefully at the contents - at least as much as she is willing to show us now ... and she is carefully looking back!

The adventure continues!

Sunday, May 24, 2020

Friday, May 15, 2020


So here she is ... all 7 or 8 pounds of her!  The smallest full grown cat we have ever had.  And getting pictures of her has been a challenge.  She can be ellusive.

Aja actually entered our home under the name of Asia.  That is what the shelter had for her name.  But when we got home we noticed on the previous owner's surrender form - her name was Aja!  After about 24 hours we decided to keep her name as Aja.

Aja is our second female cat (out of 11) and our first orange tabby!  She is also our first adult adoption.

She has beautiful markings but you can see here that her
stomach sinks in.  This picture is from day 1.

Our first evening at home with Aja was fairly quiet.  She came out from under the bed to visit the litter box - once.  No food or water, but the box got a visit.  Ok, normal.  But around bedtime my husband and I were both in the bedroom together and I think that made her nervous.  She couldn't watch us both at the same time.  At one point my husband - who is legally blind - stepped on her.  The very first night!!  He was devastated.  She was pissed!!  Hissing and swatting at him as he tried to get on the floor to 'apologize.'  She didn't know what he was doing and that was upsetting her too.  I said to stand and just ignore her.  Give her space to recover herself.  That night she let me pet her.  But it was a troublesome start.

She sleeps during the day ... and under the bed.  Periodically each day I would slip my hand down between the bed and the wall and she would rub against it.  And then she would come out.  On day 2 she began to eat.  That was a great relief to us.

We are now at day 5 she is making strides at trusting us and we are making strides at reading her body language.  She expresses anxiety with rapidly wagging tail, then a hiss, maybe a short growl and finally a paw swipe (nails retracted) ... all in that order.  Once I figured that out, we were golden.  Thankfully the things she is anxious about are reducing.   In fact, that sequence has almost totally gone away - as she has relax somewhat in her new environment.  Poor little girl.  She must have hated the last two weeks in the shelter.

There have been a bunch of fun mini steps in her adjustment.  Like the night when I was sitting in the bedroom rocker.  My husband was asleep, the lights were out and I was reading my Kindle.  She had been rubbing my legs when suddenly she jumped up into my lap.  I think we were both stunned!!  She sat there watching for my reaction and I was doing the same with her.  Her eyes were on me and her tail was waving.  Anxiety!  I gently rubbed her under her chin. She relaxed and the tail settled.  Actually we both relaxed!  Hahaha.  She lasted for about 45 seconds, then jumped down.  Next time it will be longer.

Now she comes out from under the bed (where she still sleeps) at the sound of my voice calling her.  She looks for affection.  She is checking us out for any rules - little does she know - there are no rules!! Ha.

The gate separates our bedroom and bathroom from the rest of
the condo so that our cat has a safe zone when company is
around.  We kept is closed the first 3 days.
The last two days we left it open.
She still chooses to stay in the bedroom.
And just so you know, the gray cat in the picture -
lower left corner, is a wood carving door stop.  :-)

It sure looks interesting
out there.  L-)
She still self-contains herself in the bedroom.  She is familiar with the space now, and food and litter are readily available.  She sometimes sits and looks out the gate at the rest of the condo, but her tail starts to wave and I know she is still unsure.  One time she stepped past the open gate and crept out about 4 steps - stopped - and ran back with belly to the ground.  With time she will be a bit more adventuresome, but for now she is happy to stick in her "safe zone."  But she does continue to look.

But even with the gate open
she isn't sure the time is right!
Today I decided it was time to see if she could tolerate me lifting her.  So I lifted her onto our bed.  It was a fast movement and she did not object.  I picked her up two other times today.  All to the bed.  She did fine.   Later my husband and I were on the bed, he was listening to an audio book and I was talking to her.  She jumped right up on the bed - without an invite.  And she stayed with us a bit.

So all in all ... she is doing great!!  The rate of her adjustment is progressing!  

We got lucky.  I think she is a great cat with a recent bad experience.  And she got lucky to.  We have 50 years of cat ownership under our belt.  We can be patient and understand the language of "cat" very well.

As I fall in love with this little creature, I can't help but remember that she is a heartbreak waiting in the wings of my life at some future date.  I wonder why I do this to myself when their lives are so short compared to ours - and then she rubs up against my legs purring and I remember.  Love from a pet holds no judgement.  Yes, you must earn it, but once earned - you are their 'person' until they take their last breath.

Here's hoping you keep breathing for a long time, dear Aja!