My Self-Destructive Path to Wellness

Yes, I am well 

despite my best efforts to undermine that effort! 

But I am not entirely a 'good do-bee' when left unattended!

Yesterday I made a trip to the library - an innocent trip.

After all, who gets into trouble going to the library.

On the way I stopped at the grocery store to pick up a few things.  

It can't get any more innocuous than a grocery store.  

While pulling into the parking lot I got very hungry - VERY hungry.  I had left the house around lunchtime without eating (something I wouldn't ever do in my 'pre-flu, dieting days.' )

Upon entering the store I decided to pick up a sandwich.  I also determined that I deserved salty fatty potato chips.  A big bag so I could have some for later as well.  After all, I had suffered! I had earned chips.

I walked to the prepared food section and found 3 small ham and cheese sliders (without mayo - being virtuous because of the potato chips), walked passed the bakery and a slice of cheese cake with strawberry topping landed in my basket (fruit, you know), then I headed to the chip isle.  Being a sanely reasonable person, I decided against the big bag of chips - and decided to get the medium size bag (2-3 servings per bag size).  Ok, I got 2 of those bags.  I couldn't make up my mind between cheddar flavored chips and regular chips.

As I reached the check out I noticed that the candy was on sale - buy one and get one free.  Decisions, decisions.  I settled on my all time favorite Hersey's Chocolate bars with Almonds (2 of them) and my second favorite, Baby Ruths (2 of them as well.). I just couldn't decide - and they were on sale after all, AND, just in case anyone is wondering, they both had protein: nuts!!

Before my hand even hit the exit door, the Chedder flavored chips were open and I was eating them.  Hungry - remember?  When got in the car - instead of driving and eating at the same time (safety, ok) I decided to eat in the parking lot.  As I opened the ham and cheese sliders a thought cross my mind, "You should really throw away half of this junk food."  Before I could let my better self take action on that thought (I had just purchased these things.  Crazy thoughts to throw them away within 10 minutes of purchase!  Who does that ??????), so before I did anything regrettable - I stuffed those sliders into my mouth, finished the potato chips, and started in on the cheese cake.

Somewhere between the start of the cheese cake and the end of it, my stomach started sending messages to my brain - urgent messages - "What the heck is going on?  For weeks you feed me nothing but soup, yogurt, scrambled eggs, lemon/honey tea, soft toast ... and now I am getting an avalanche of ... whatever this crap is!!  Have you lost your mind?"

I eyed the chocolate bar.  

Seriously, I did.   

I couldn't help wondering just how serious my stomach was.

Ok, I won't eat the chocolate now, but I won't be throwing it away either.  (Compromise - I am nothing if not a compromise.)

On the ride home I began to calculate the diet damage I had done to my months of Weight Watcher weight loss.  It wasn't pretty.  Just before I came down with the flu I returned to Weight Watchers - and the damage I did over 3 1/2 months absent from the program was only 3 1/2 lbs.  I had been good even when I wasn't being weighed weekly.  In fact, when I was seen by the doctor during the flu I had lost weight from my last Weight Watcher weigh in.  I was golden!!

Except ... how would this feast - eaten in about 7.5 minutes - play out on the scale?

Those 4 candy bars had to go.  I got home and unpacked my purchases.  I realized immediately that I couldn't just throw them away.  If I really wanted to throw them away, I should have thrown them out the car window driving home.  That would be littering and I couldn't do that!!

I put them in the freezer.

That was yesterday.
Today they are gone.

And they were good!

  Four candy bars - spread out over time,  (a short time)

because I didn't want to wake up the sleeping giant in my stomach.

Now what to do about Weight Watchers!  It will be 3 weeks from my last weigh in.  How will I explain all of this?

I am nothing if I am not inventive (and compromising.)

Here is the tale.  I had the flu (true ... going for the sympathy vote here), and I had to take steroids for a swollen throat (also true ... more sympathy) and everyone knows that steroids adds weight to your frame no matter how little eat (absolutely true - it is the doctor's fault!)  I am off the steroids now.  Things will improve - if I just avoid libraries and grocery stores.

That's my story.

What do ya' think?