Mark Twain

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do ...
Explore. Dream. Discover." Mark Twain

Friday, December 30, 2011

"Resorting" to launch 2012


Resorting ...
that is what my life seems to be about now.

A lot of time has been spent resorting
... like space ...
our upstairs den is a good example. It used to be mom's sitting room, but now it is my craft room.

The desk in this picture is mom's desk. We tried to get it into her assisted living room, but it wouldn't fit. So it now resides in my craft room. I use it to file mom's important papers and to do her minimal bill paying and bookkeeping.

There are no before pictures, but here are some after pictures.

This closet shows only half of the space my yarn stash occupies. Slide the door to the left and the other half is just as full - floor to ceiling. I was feeling pretty good about squeezing all the yarn into this closet ... very good, until I found another pocket of sock yarn stash that isn't in this closet. It looks like this ...

Yes, that is all sock yarn! Enough yarn to make 80+ pairs of socks!!
Where that bunch of yarn is going, I haven't figured out yet, but the closet is full up!!
Right now it is sitting on the floor of the craft room
making me feel guilty for having so much stash.

All my knitting, crochet, spinning and weaving books are gathered together in this new craft space. That feels pretty good. Easy to see and use.

On top of that book case is my weaving loom all folded up. Once the dust settles on all this stuff shifting, I want to set up the loom again. Beside the loom is a stack of magazines and patterns that need to be sorted and filed.

My filing system is loose leaf binders sorted by project type.
There is probably a bunch of stuff in there I could get rid of
given the time to sort through it all.

And my spinning wheel is now housed safely on a round table near the yarn and the fiber.
It is dusty and I need to give it a little loving attention. But it is nice to see it out where I could easily use it without interference from the various pets.
This picture also shows the other side of the overly full yarn closet.

And I still maintain mom's bedroom - the room that now houses most of her earthly belongings. It is ready for guests - since mom probably can never sleep there again. It still makes me a little sad when I walk in knowing that she doesn't reside there anymore. But she has adapted fairly well to her new room and home, so the "problem" of occupancy appears to be mine alone. It will fade with time I know.
But I fear the hole left in my life and heart, while smaller, will always be there.

I am spending a lot of time moving other stuff around as well.
Although I am not a hobby cook, I do cook every day.
My cookbooks have never had an adequate home.

Initially they were in a book case in the living room, then in a book case in the basement (a worse location), and then stacked in a kitchen cabinet ... closer to the action, but hard to see and harder to use. Our eat in kitchen no longer needs space for a walker,
so I brought up an old book case from the basement.
And for someone who doesn't care much about cooking, I have a lot of cookbooks.

I am "resorting" my alone time. I have really missed my walks. It is alone time and thinking time. So for the umpteenth time, I am heading back to walking. My little walking icon at the top of my blog doesn't show the 1.4 miles I walked today! I guess I am not working the app right. Or maybe the little person on the graph is bent over in laughter at the 1.4 miles I logged and can't catch her breath to show the total ... after all the goal is 1,000 miles by December 31, 2012. I only need to do 998.6 more miles! Only!! :-)

Other alone time is also changing. I used to value the hours between 8:00 pm and midnight. My mother and husband would have gone to their rooms for the night and I would putter around doing this and that. Now I find my body slowing down and settling into the quiet before sleep - around 10:00 pm. That evening time doesn't seem as precious as it once did.

Maybe I am focused on "just keeping busy" so my mind doesn't settle on stuff I can't control. Maybe I am finally free enough to do some long over due stuff.
Maybe I am resorting my empty nest to change the look and feel and push away emotions.

All I know is that at the end of the day I am very tired from all the "resorting."

Welcome to the new year everyone.

Welcome 2012!


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can't tell you how many times I've "resorted". Times when my daughter moved out, moved in, moved out, moved in, etc etc... times when family members passed on and gifted us with items... retirement...reno's... so many "resorts". Those times really do serve a purpose. They help you to clear your mind. Here's to a well sorted 2012.

Noofy said...

Keep going, you're doing fine. Your Mom has adjusted, you haven't to your new lifestyles. You're right, it will take time. Be patient, keep going, always here to listen and support anytime. A new year, new beginnings.

Linda said...

Love how your craft room looks, have I mentioned how nice sock yarn works for woven scarves? So nice to see all your tools and supplies ready for use, hopefully it will inspire me to deal with my piles of fiber. 2012 is off to a good start.

Bica said...

You have a beautiful way of expressing your thoughts and feelings. I felt a sadness when I saw the bed your mom slept in, and how she'll most likely never sleep there again. I'm having a hard time adjusting to this entire process of losing parents, growing older, and knowing that I'm a part of the next generation that may, someday, end up living in a bedroom in one of my children's homes. You seem to be on a good path, adjusting to the changes in your life. I hope you have a wonderful and healthy New Year.

g-girl said...

You needed to do the resorting. It's a way of clearing your mind as the clutter in your life clears up. At least that's how I look at it. :)