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Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Through My Care Giver Eyes - One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

Just a short update
Forward and Back

Backward - she fell

Forward - she appeared OK initially

Backward - she wasn't OK - and getting worse steadily

Forward - x-ray was negative - no breaks or fractures

Forward - no emergency room or hospital stay

Backward - unable to rise from chair or walk without pain - needs constant monitoring

Backward - almost fell in the middle of the night from her bed

Backward - hurt my back - not badly but makes it hard to assist her with the lifting stuff

Forward - decision made - she must go back into sub acute rehab

Backward - I am now sleeping on the floor outside her room at night

Forward - busy weekend with company - she was happy

Backward - she never leaves her chair except to go to the bathroom or to go to bed

Backward - getting weaker by the moment - you can see it happening each day

Forward - got her into my first choice rehab facility into a private room- a Cadillac of an institution

Backward - must wait 4 days before she can be admitted - room available then

Backward - must limp along as we are doing now for 4 days

Backward - she is sad because she has to leave the house

Backward - her pain continues, her weakness grows visibly every day

Backward - my back continues to stiffen

Backward - must miss my knitting group today - small backward step really compared to all we are dealing with ... but they keep me from total isolation ... they are my sanity group ... they are meeting right this minute and I am now sad because I am not there.

Backward - two more nights of sleeping on the floor - hope my back holds out

Backward - it is now 9:40 am and she is still in bed - will she be bed ridden by Thursday? is she depressed?

The trends are definitely downward.
But the die is cast.
She must go into rehab so we can all take back our lives.

Forward - I am resolute! This is the right step to take. What will be, will be. I will change this downward trend even if it is by force of my will alone!

I will.




6 comments:

Linda said...

I do hope she gets to rehab without any more problems! Hang in there - my thoughts are with you and they are all positive!

Unknown said...

Sending you healing energy. You are an amazing women. Yes your mom may be depressed but one person can only take so much. Rehab will help is she can make it through the first few day. Blessings to you all.
QMM

Laura said...

I'm sure your mom, in her helplessness and pain, must surely be depressed. Hoping that she will once again be on her road to recovery. Please remember to take time for yourself, even if it's a minute or two. A good cry when you're showering works wonders...

Jen said...

I have to say that although I don't always have time to comment, I have been reading along with your progress with your mother with so much sympathy. You are doing such wonderful work with her, and I hope that you can both heal and recover when she enters the rehab facility.

Anonymous said...

You are a good strong woman with your Moms and your families best interests at heart....all will be well....you are doing all the right things for all the right reasons. Sending good wishes and healing thoughts your way.

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Elaine .. it takes two - and you must consider yourself, which thankfully you are doing. I hope you and your back, and your mother can hold out til Thursday .. with many thoughts .. Hilary