Mark Twain

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do ...
Explore. Dream. Discover." Mark Twain

Friday, February 17, 2012

I struggle.

Here we are in February ... and I still have not been successful at taking back the habit of walking.

Although mom's needs no longer fill my every minute now that she lives in Assisted Living, my days seem to pass filled with every activity accept taking a walk.

And it frustrates me that this is the case. So, in true Retired Knitter Style, I tried to examine why I can't seem to take back this one activity that is so important to my health and future functioning.

I think the answer is buried in my recent life changes. For five and half years of care giving, I have felt like a tightly coiled spring, ready to jump, always on alert, in a state of anticipation. Looking back I realize that I used walking to release some of that energy. At times I needed walking to clear my head, to provide some equilibrium ... it had nothing to do with being healthier. And it wasn't done with enough frequency even then to attain any health benefits. But when I did walk, I did get an immediate release of stress and energy so it was a bit more easy to put on the walking shoes.

Like the pendulum on a clock, I seem to have swung in the opposite direction over the last two months. My coiled-spring response to life has relaxed. Activities that draw me in are more thought-filled activities. The "need to walk it off" just seems to be gone.

And the habit to walk for health and enjoyment is harder to start because there isn't an immediate feedback. Building that new habit - one that you know is good for you, that you know will make you feel better - is much harder to adopt when the "carrot" is months away.

So I think I know what is going on.

I wonder if that will help move that little lady on the top of my blog a bit more!!

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm going to make a suggestion. Make a promise that you will blog a photo taken at least half a mile from your house (can't be the same one each day lol)each day. Pick up your camera put on your shoes and go take that picture. Snow shots, birds, shadows, houses, whatever strikes your fancy...

Linda said...

I can empathize - I seem to be good at talking about exercise but not so good at making it part of my regular day even though I think it is very important! One excuse will soon be gone - ordered a new Pilates CD to take the place of the one that has been lost for a long long time!

Carolyn said...

Perhaps as Spring comes you will feel more like getting outside. Today was so much nicer here than yesterday.
When I walked regularly, I actually set my alarm early enough to walk before I went in to work. It was a great way to start the day.

Vee said...

This looking at a situation in a closer way to figure out what is really going on has always fascinated me. I really enjoyed following your thought process and I think you are onto something. Now I need to analyze why I'm not walking. I know this, a lot of it has to do with the messy sidewalks, but I'm sure that it's deeper than that.

Vee said...

Oh I love that suggestion above! Perhaps that would work...

Retired Knitter said...

Getting out the door seems to be the stumbling block. Taking pictures has helped in the past. But it seems that my list of activities that must be done now is mostly external to the house. I am not at home all that much. When mom lived with me I was forced to be home more. Now to see her I must travel. Other stuff has pulled me from the home as well.

Still thinking on this.

Unknown said...

It's not easy to get into a habit when it's not at the top of your list. I struggle with staying motivated to exercise and eat less. I'm not very competitive, so entering myself in a race wouldn't help either. I hope you find a fun way to exercise that doesn't feel like a chore.
Thank you also for visiting and commenting on my blog, and for being my newest follower! I appreciated that so much!

Hold my hand: a social worker's blog said...

Make walking an activity in which you will be thinking of a writing project, a blog post, for instance. That's what I do. I no longer go for a walk if I'm stressed. I go for a walk as a way to find inspiration to write. During my walks, I seem to come up with new ideas, and sometimes, with a whole new story already outlined.

The picture challenge is a good one too.

Doris